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"I don't know Todd well, but he strikes me as a decent man. He will provide for you and the baby, I’m sure of it."
I sighed as I scraped my hands over my face. "I know. But I don't want to rely on him. Which means tomorrow, I have to start looking for a new job."
"Did he fire you?" She looked at me indignantly. "If he fired you, that changes—"
"No. I quit. I just couldn't work for a man who believed I would lie and cheat."
Analyn put her arm around me and tugged me close. "It sounds to me like you and Todd still have a lot more talking to do. And even if things don't work out between you two, you need to find a way to get along for the sake of the baby. I can understand not wanting to continue to work for him and wanting to be self-sufficient, but don't dismiss his support. Not just financially, but as a parent as well. It's not easy being a parent. I can't imagine doing it alone.”
I nodded. "Thank you for being here."
"Of course. It’s the least I can do for all the times you’ve been here for me."
We sat quietly for a few minutes. I was so grateful for Analyn, for the strength and support that she gave me. Even when I made mistakes, she was always there for me.
A knock on the door made us both startle.
"Did you invite Ruby and Naomi over as well?" Analyn asked.
I shook my head as I stood. "No. I haven't told them anything. Well, Naomi knows I'm pregnant, but she doesn't know all this with Todd." I walked over to the door, looking through the peephole.
My heart rate sped up as Todd stood on the other side of the door. I craned my head around toward Analyn. "It's Todd."
She stood. "Good. You two have a lot of things to talk about." She nodded toward the door. "Maybe you should let him in."
I sucked in a deep breath and opened the door. Todd looked as emotionally worn out as I felt.
Analyn stepped up next to me, giving me a hug. "You got this, babe." She stepped through the door as Todd moved aside so she could exit. She looked up at him. "Love can make you say and do and think stupid things. Remember that."
He looked from her to me as if he didn't understand. I simply shrugged. He looked back at Analyn. "I’ll remember that."
Analyn walked off, and I was left alone with Todd. The last time we talked, we both said very hurtful things. I wondered if this time, it would be more of the same. But Analyn was right. No matter what, Todd’s and my life were connected through this baby, so I needed to find a way to get along with him.
35
Todd
"Love can make you say and do and think stupid things. Remember that." Analyn's words echoed in my brain as I stepped into Betts's apartment. Why did she say them? She couldn't know how I felt about Betts. Was she implying that Betts loved me?
The kernel of hope bloomed in my heart even as I told it not to. Her words earlier in the day and her resignation this evening told me all I needed to know. What she needed to know was that I would not sign over the rights to the baby. She was stuck with me for the long haul, even if she felt I was incapable of loving my child.
I followed her to her living area, both of us silent. Finally, when we were both standing and staring at each other, I said, "I guess Analyn knows."
She nodded. "She's a good friend to me."
"I suppose she was the first one to know." I tried to keep my voice calm, even though deep down, the idea that Betts hadn't told me first about the baby was like a stake through the heart.
She looked down. "Yes.” When she looked up at me, I saw regret in her eyes. "I'm sorry about that. And I'm sorry for the things I said to you earlier."
I nodded, my own guilt and regret replacing the pain of her betrayal. "I'm sorry too.” This time, I was the one looking down in shame. Finally, I lifted my gaze to hers. "Dean told me that you said we needed to talk about our feelings. I know you think I don't have them or that I'm incapable of love or being a good parent—"
She shook her head vehemently. "Todd—"
I held my hand up to stop her. "I can understand why you might think that based on my failed marriage and relationship with Dean. So now I'm going to do what you told him to do and tell you how I feel.”
She swallowed and waited.
“I love you."
