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“I’m wondering,” she muses, “would you be here saying these words if you didn’t know the truth of what my mother did? Would you ever have forgiven me had you never known my motives for going to that stupid meeting?”
I could lie to her. I could tell her emphatically I would have come around and her reasons wouldn’t matter.
But I’m not a liar.
“I honestly don’t know. I’d like to think once my temper cooled, I would’ve thought about things more deeply. Realized that you wouldn’t ever intentionally try to hurt me. I think I would have figured out there was more to the story.”
She glances away, rubs at the back of her neck. Not the greatest answer, but it’s the sincerest one. I hold my breath, wondering what she’ll do because I’ve got nothing else to offer. I’ve admitted my wrongdoing, and I’ve asked for forgiveness.
When she lifts her gaze, I don’t like the sadness I see. I know her answer before she says it. “I’m sorry, Hendrix. But I had someone who loved me once and walked out because things were too hard. I gave her a second chance, and you know what I found out?”
I don’t answer. It’s rhetorical.
“People don’t change. I don’t have it in me to go through it again.”
Christ, that’s a gut punch, and it’s an effort not to curl in on the pain squeezing my chest. I glance at John who actually has empathy for me in his eyes.
Nodding in understanding, I unzip my jacket and pull out the journal. I set it on the bar. John blinks in surprise that I completed my mission, and Stevie just stares at it a long moment before bringing her gaze back to mine.
I give her an understanding nod. She’s not ready yet to let me back in. I’ll try again and again until I get her to budge.
“Keep a tab open, and I’ll send money over to pay it off.”
I spare one more glance at John who, surprisingly, claps a hand to my shoulder and squeezes. That’s a message for Stevie and nothing else.
I turn away and head out of the bar. A few of the guys call out thanks as I move by.
Out on the sidewalk, I zip my jacket and shove my hands into the pockets. It’s fucking cold tonight, and this jacket is too light, but I only parked a few blocks down.
I’m barely a few steps away from Jerry’s when the door opens. I jolt when I hear Stevie call out, “Wait.”
Spinning around, my heart pounding, I see her there looking very uncertain but clutching her journal to her chest. “How did you get this?”
I ignore the question because it’s of no importance right now. “I didn’t get it back for you to earn any brownie points.”
Stevie glances down at it. “No, you wouldn’t do that.” Her eyes lift and finally, I see a glimmer of something soft. “Thank you. A lot of distressing things have happened in the last few days, but now that I’ve cut my mom out and gotten this back, two of the three major things have been taken care of.”
I take it as a good sign she’s talking, and I step toward her. “You cut your mom out?”
She nods. “I went to her house and confronted her. She admitted it was a con from the start. I found out she needed money, but not ten thousand. They played upon my wanting a relationship with her and used it to get me to do some things I wasn’t proud of.”
I fucking can’t help myself. One more step, and she’s within reach. My hand goes to the side of her neck, and I almost dance with joy that she doesn’t pull away. “You did nothing wrong, Stevie.”
“Even entertaining her scheme was wrong,” she says, her tone full of self-loathing. “Going to meet that reporter was wrong.”
“No… none of that was ultimately hurtful to anything but my ego.”
“I’m really sorry—”
I take a chance she won’t knee me in the balls, and I kiss her to stop her words. When I pull back, I whisper, “You already apologized. It’s my turn to tell you I accept it. Okay?”
Her eyes drop from mine and she nods.
“Any chance you’ll accept my apology?” I ask.
Taking a deep breath, she tips her head up at me and huffs out exasperation. “I suppose I have to after you got my journal back.”
Relief courses through me because she’s teasing.
Somewhat.
“The journal has nothing to do with it.” I punctuate that with a slight squeeze to her neck. “I fucked up big-time, Stevie. It was absolutely wrong of me not to listen to the entire story. I owed you that. Hell, I promised I’d be the type of guy who would give it my all, and I failed you.”
“You said all that in the bar.”
