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“It’s almost time,” Kai says.
Peeking curiously at the box between his feet, Cia asks, “Time for what?” Her eyes widen when he pulls a white and black lantern out. “Oh!”
The lanterns are all shaped like hearts, with a black line across the middle and a scythe painted at the top. I have no idea how Kai magically had ten or so delivered to his house. Hell, for all I know, he either had people make them that fast, or maybe a warehouse filled with random ass things just in case he wants to use them. No matter the reason, it’s perfect.
“Tonight, we send our hopes into the sky and let go of old loss,” Liam says as he, too, takes a lantern.
“We say goodbye to what we’ve lost before we could love it,” I say.
Kai pulls out a storm lighter from his pocket. “Tonight, we decide to look forward.”
Tears stream down Cia’s cheeks as she nods empathetically. “Tonight is ours,” she murmurs. “All of ours.”
We move so we’re forming a circle around her. Kai hands her the lighter, and she’s the first one to light her lantern. “I feel selfish for never knowing I wanted you,” she says softly. “But now that we’ve lost you, I wonder what kind of person you would have been. A mischief maker, a natural leader, or maybe just someone who wants to live and love. Whomever you would have been, we would have loved and protected you with everything we have.”
She lets go of the lantern with a squeak, and we all watch silently as it floats above the sea and into the night sky.
Each of us follows suit, giving a little speech before lighting and sending our lanterns after hers. If I one day have to pinpoint a time in history where we all truly came together, this is it. Being so open and vulnerable is only possible when you share a potent moment, and while we have plenty of those, this is the one that counts above all. The one where we all know we belong together, and that it’s only possible because of the woman in our midst.
“One day,” Cia says wistfully. “One day, we’ll have a house filled with kids.”
Liam laughs. “I can’t wait to go to an imaginary tea-party and play with dolls.”
As much as the image of Liam sipping tea from a small cup or eating dirt because our kid decrees it to be cake amuses me, I groan theatrically. “Or teach our boy to play football and climb trees.”
Kai clears his throat. “It takes a village… and we have that. Our kids will be so fucking loved.”
After the lanterns for the kid we never got to know are gone, Cia makes us light the rest. One for Gemma, Alexander, Nikolaos, Abel, and even Isolde gets one.
“There are three left,” Liam points out when she’s done saying goodbye to those she’s lost.
Cia takes Kai’s hand. “Two of them are for you,” she murmurs softly. “Say your goodbye to Nadia and Ana. Don’t allow them to become synonymous with something dirty or tainted. I didn’t know Nadia, but I know you so I just know she was a good person who was dealt a shitty hand in the game called life.”
It wasn’t until we went through Abel’s files for the millionth time that we found more about Nadia. Ana was convinced her sister’s death was organized, but we never found any proof of that. Even Abel looked into it without finding anything to back up those suspicions, at least that’s what his notes say. Cia asked Morgana to let us know if she finds anything about it, but Kai made it clear he didn’t want to know.
At first I totally thought finding out about Nadia’s secret identity would open some old wounds for him, but he honestly hasn’t seemed that bothered. All his attention is on Cia, and he keeps reiterating that he’s fine but wants to leave it in the past.
While I don’t know his reasons, I think I get it. No matter what he learns, Nadia was a big part of his past. But all this new knowledge can really do is sour his memories. No matter what he finds, it’s not like he can talk to her and ask her the important question of why. So, yeah, live and let fucking go.
Kai swallows thickly. “Nereid.” That’s all he says before claiming her lips.
While they cling to each other, I look across the ocean and beach. I can see why Cia is so drawn to this place.
When Kai has sent the lanterns up for Nadia and Ana, Cia takes the last one.
“This one is for all of us.” Her gaze touches each of us. “This is our baggage. Our pain, resentment, insecurity, rage, betrayal, and whatever else we’ve felt because of what happened. We need to let it go so we can truly start over.”
I’m not sure it’s that easy to let go. Some wounds run deep, like the ones Marian instilled with her fucking warfare and manipulation. But maybe I don’t need to let go of it. Perhaps the best thing I can do is keep it with me and make sure that when the time comes, I’ll be ready to love our child unconditionally.
Chapter 30
Liam
It’sbeenamonthsince we said goodbye to our pasts. Cheesy as it sounded when Gus suggested it, it worked. Something shifted inside all of us, making it possible to overcome what we’d suffered through.
With our focus no longer on the past, we were able to look ahead, and do normal things like plan agápi’s formal coronation—well, all of ours.
“An entire year?” Remus asks, shocked. “You’re planning on taking a year off and… how was it you worded it, Liam? Eat candy floss, ride rollercoasters, and try not to get lost in the Bermuda Triangle?”
