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I tugged her along down the passage, enjoying the closeness of her body, refusing to unthread my hand from hers. To the outside world, there was no mistaking what we were - she was perfect for me. It was as if being with her had awoken something in me - had filled me with the want to discover all the fucking possibilities.
I was love drunk on the girl who threw a knife at me - Da would get a kick out of that - would tell me that it was a story for the grandkids. We pushed past a group of people, making our way into the cafeteria, and if the group of people in front of us weren’t giving him a wide berth, I may have missed him, but Benson SinClaire stood in the cafeteria, his glare on Marissa and I ominous. In accordance with his plans, I should have been dead. I flashed him my trademark O’Riley smile and watched his face tighten with displeasure. Not only had the Cartel not killed me, we had somehow struck an alliance - over Marissa of all things. I wondered if Benson knew that Blaise was dead - if Johnny had taken him apart with his particular brand of violence. The boy had earned his reputation through blood and gore alone, and I wasn't sorry that we were suddenly on the same side.
I ignored him, seating Marissa at a table where one of the cameras had a perfect view of us. I made a show of greeting everyone along the way, nudging Marissa to do the same before I finally walked to the counter and picked her up something to eat. It was about time she started to understand that I was going to take care of her - that it was my job as her man. It wasn’t a hardship, though, watching her eyes dance in delight at the dessert I’d piled up on her tray. Because that’s what I returned to the table with - nothing but dessert, and for the first time since I left our bed this morning, she smiled, and I knew we’d be all right. She just had to believe in us.
Marissa was still reserved, but each time she slipped out to leave a calling card on behalf of The Warden I went with her. Sometimes I lingered by the doorway, sometimes I stood in the closet, and when one of the security dressed in a suit tried to get frisky with her, I knocked him out with a crowbar to the back of his head. I knew that this was some sort of debt that she had to pay, and if I could help her pay it off quicker, then I would. I just hated the fact that there was a debt in the first place.
Our time in this place was coming to an end, and while I didn’t want to leave because this was where I mether, I was eager to get back home. I had so much to debrief the family on - things that couldn’t be discussed over the phone. But every time I raised the subject of her cominghome with me, she changed the topic. Even after all this time, she was skittish, and if me taking a crowbar to a man’s skull for her didn’t win her over, then I wasn’t sure what would. I had just over a week to convince her to come home with me. It fucking annoyed me that we were even in this situation. I still didn’t know anything about her - her family - her life outside of The Society, and while she may not know who my family really was and what we did, she knew I had one - she knew I had a brother, had heard me speak to my mother. And all I knew was that she was beholden to The Warden.
I knew the sounds she made just before she came as if it was my favorite song lyric. I knew that sometimes she grew restless in the early hours of the morning and the only thing that settled her was a bath. I knew how she liked her coffee, and that she was one of those heathens who actually liked pineapple on her pizza. I knew how she tasted - what her legs felt like wrapped around my head. But I didn’t knowwhyshe was here, orwhereshe lived. Was she an orphan? Did she have siblings? It was enough to drive me mad, and I was running out of time to get the answers that I needed.
And just as I thought of her, so she entered our apartment. Her scent soothing, her hair beautiful, and I watched her quietly as she sashayed over to me, kicking off her ridiculous heels. I had no fucking idea why she wore them - probably because that was what The Society expected, but behind these walls, she wore my shirts and panties. I didn’t hate it. Her lips pressed against my neck in greeting, but before I could reciprocate in kind, she had pushed away, mumbling something about taking a quick shower. Goddamn tease.
But I waited, waited like the good boy I was, my coffee growing cold in the process. And when I was just about to go in and see what in God’s earth was taking so long, she stepped out of the room, and swear to fucking God my heart stopped beating. My girl was gorgeous on any given day - no matter what she was wearing, or where she was. But now? Now she was mouth watering. My cock hardened to an almost painful level as I took her in. Marissa wore a black corset that pushed her breasts to delectable heights, making me want to bite her nipple. A matching black thong left nothing to the imagination - I could see the outline of the lips of her pussy pressing against the material, and it made me want to tear the piece of thread straight from her body. Black thigh high boots completed the outfit, and I was ready to get on my goddamn knees and worship her, treating her as my temple - as something holy to be savored. In all the time I’d been with her, she hadn’t been a lingerie kind of girl, and while I had no fucking idea what was happening here, I was into it - intoher.
Before I could move - touch her - press my mouth against her flesh, she pressed her knees against the floor before me, and as a reflex, I widened my thighs. I wasn’t going to question the gift she was offering, so when her fingers unclipped my belt, I lifted my ass to pull my pants down, and thenhermouth was onme, sucking and pulling me deeper down her throat, and I swear to God, no one had ever felt sweeter. I could die inside of this girl and I’d be the happiest fucking man to have lived. She stared up at me with her doe eyed blue eyes, her cheeks hollowed, her lips around my cock, and I took a moment to imprint the image onto my brain for a lifetime. As she worked me, her cleavage spilled out of her, and I couldn’t resist, I slid my fingers down, pinching the hardened bud of her breast that taunted me. She moaned on my cock, the vibration zinging straight to my balls. “You take my cock down your throat so fucking well.” I praised her as she worked me. “You’re magnificent - too goddamn pretty for words, but the way you suck me is something dreams are fucking made of.” She moaned once more, my words working her up as she bobbed her head up and down with more vigor.
I threw my head back, thinking of everything but how goddamn good she looked because if I kept looking at her like that, I’d come, and I wanted this moment to last longer than five fucking minutes.
She pulled her mouth off of me with a loud pop, and I groaned at the loss of contact. “Lie down on the bed so that you can lick me while I suck on your cock.”
And the loss I felt only a moment ago was suddenly replaced by pure anticipation. I would never get enough of her taste. Goddamn.
We spent the afternoon getting lost in one another, eating dinner in bed only to roll over for round two, and I was certain that there wasn’t a couple out there luckier than us. I wanted this every fucking day for the rest of my life. Her gaze softened as she kissed me, rode me, her nails digging into my shoulders as I pressed her into the mattress, fucking her so slowly it hurt, but I didn’t want to lose this - didn’t want this to end.
I fell asleep wrapped in her scent, her body warm against mine as I nestled my dick against her ass.
The bed was cold when I woke and Iknew. I just fucking knew. Still I searched for her, even when I noted that all her shit was gone. I screamed, throwing a lamp across the room, taking satisfaction in the way it shattered against the doorway.
She was a fucking coward. We still had a week here and my hellcat had tapped out early - didn’t even have the balls totell methat last night was our goodbye.
And there, sitting on the bed was a neatly folded note. She left me a breakup letter, and I wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it all - as if what we had could be reduced to a piece of paper. I wanted to burn it - throw it in the trash - erase every part of her from the goddamn room because the sheets still smelled of her.
FUUUUUCK!
I sat on the bed, unfolding the note that she left behind - my last connection to her. Part of me wanted to phone Johnny up - to demand he tell me where she was because he would know. It struck me then that she trusted him more than she trusted me because heknewher, while I was only offered the small pieces of herself she had been willing to share with me while on Society soil.
Mack.
This was always how our story would play out.
I wish I could be the girl you wanted - I wish
I could tell you everything, but even if we had
all those hard conversations, it would change
nothing, and only make the heartache that
much worse.
Just know that I was happiest with you.
Thank you for teaching me about love because
there’s no doubt in my mind that that’s what this was.
PS: I Just want the truth.
