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That it would take time and most likely a shit ton of space and sadness?
“Özür dilerim. Shit, I keep slipping. I mean...I’m sorry. For hurting you. I didn’t mean what I said. I just...I really miss my family.” My voice was barely loud enough to carry over the salt-heavy air. “I’m sorry for this morning, and I’m sorry for now.” I trembled a little as she wrapped her fingers around my wrist, holding me in place as I went to pull away.
She didn’t speak.
And words got caught on my tongue as I croaked, “You want to know something about me? Fine, I’ll tell you.” My fingertips stung against her soft cheek. “You absolutely terrify me. You’re so alive and sure and painful. And I—”
The whoosh of air and murmur of voices wrenched both our heads up.
I yanked my hand from her cheek, leaving scratches of her fingernails on my wrist as I ripped out of her hold.
Our eyes caught.
The sparks that’d appeared between us from our fight exploded into brighter stars, just as Jack popped up from the staircase, threw his flippers onto the deck, and hauled his heavy bulk with its tank and weight belt onboard. His jaw clenched as Neri linked her hands together and smiled an unconvincing smile. “Hi, Dad.”
Jack froze, hearing things in her tone that I wished he didn’t.
His gaze shot to my wrist and the red lines his daughter had marked me with.
Guilt roared through me; I tucked my arms behind my back like a thief.
Jack looked between us, his stare a solid, flat blue as it settled on me. The connection between Neri and me—a connection that throbbed with my grief and her kindness—a connection that meant nothing more than what it was, was suddenly ever so wrong.
Shame heated my neck; I couldn’t hold Jack’s eyes.
I wanted to tell him it wasn’t what he thought.
That I was all kinds of torn and tattered, and Neri had somehow gotten mixed up in the knots within my bleeding heart, but he stomped onto the deck and raked a hand through his dripping hair.
Anna followed him, grunting a little at the weight of climbing the ladder with her tank.
Jack wordlessly helped her out of the scuba gear before glowering at Neri. “Go get dressed, Nerida.”
His tone was curt and cold.
Anna shot him a surprised look, then glanced at me.
Confusion etched her eyes, but Jack didn’t enlighten her.
I didn’t even know what there was to enlighten.
But I knew, deep in my gut, that I’d done something forbidden by touching her and that would be the last time I would ever slip.
Nerida was not Melike.
It didn’t matter that my sister instigated lots of affection, and our parents encouraged closeness between our family.
She was not my family.
She was a girl four years my junior.
She was off-limits in every way.
Bowing my head, I muttered, “I did what you asked, sir. I mean...Jack.” Did he even want me calling him Jack after this?
Shrugging away his tension, he smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “You didn’t find it too complicated?”
“Not at all.”
“Good.” Grabbing a towel from the rack just inside the captain’s cabin, he scrubbed at his hair. “In that case, consider that your task for the week.”
I didn’t have the strength to refuse.
Anna looked back and forth between us, unzipping her wetsuit and peeling it off her slim shoulders. She didn’t say anything, but her questions stabbed me anyway.
“Right. I’m hungry. Let’s go back.” Jack strode into the cabin and switched on the engine. The faint whirring of the anchor being raised was the only noise as Neri drifted to the side of the boat to wave goodbye to the dolphins, and I slunk to the back, all while cursing the sea, Nerida, and this new existence that suddenly seemed so much more dangerous than the one I’d left behind.
Chapter Eleven
*
Aslan
*
(Moon in German: Mond)
“RUN INSIDE AND COLLECT OUR ORDER, WILL you, little fish?” Jack twisted in the front seat of his Jeep and passed his credit card to Neri in the back. “Just use payWave, but you know my pin if you need it.”
She flashed me a look where I sat beside her before palming his card and opening the car door. Her jellyfish dress had been covered with a white jumper now that the sun had gone down. “Be right back.”
The moment her door closed, leaving me trapped in the 4WD with Jack and Anna outside the local Italian restaurant, my heart started hammering.
Rubbing my sweaty palms on my borrowed shorts, I sat stiff and barely breathing.
The tension increased until finally Jack unbuckled his belt and turned to face me, his hand on the steering wheel, his face stern. “I’m only going to say this once. I’m a firm believer of trust, and in the few short days of knowing you, I can tell you are a decent, honourable guy. You might be young, and you might be adjusting to an entirely new life, but you were raised with morals. Am I right?”
