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Chills shot up my spine.
There was no way that would ever happen.
No way.
I would be gone in a week.
I had my own life to figure out.
And she’s twelve!
“You’re gonna make me wish I was born a eunuch and was never able to produce you, aren’t you?” Jack asked with a groan-chuckle.
“What’s a eunuch?”
“Never you mind.” A rustle of clothing and a grunt of a violent hug. “I love you, you crazy fish. Even if you terrify me.”
“Aslan said I terrify him too,” Neri murmured, barely audible.
My stomach churned; I held my breath.
Kafami sikeyim.
Turned out she was spilling all my secrets.
“He said that?” Jack’s question sliced with sharpness. “Why?”
“I don’t know. That’s when you interrupted.” Her voice turned louder as if she’d extracted herself from Jack’s arms. “Now, if you’re done nagging me, I’m going to bed. I did all my chores and all my homework. That means, I get to play in the sea on my terms tomorrow.”
“We’ll see.”
“You’ll see me play with baby Kohola, you’re right.”
“I disown you,” Jack mock-growled.
“And I was born to make you pay for whatever bad stuff you did in a past life.”
Silence before Jack muttered, “I shouldn’t say this. I already kinda regret saying it and haven’t even said it yet, but, Neri...one piece of advice from a man who once said the same thing to a girl that Aslan said to you.”
Neri didn’t speak and Jack took his time to formulate words into sense.
“Next time a boy says he’s terrified of you, listen to him. It’s not a compliment. It’s the truth. It means you have a power over him he doesn’t like and frankly makes him dangerous.”
“Why?” Neri asked quietly.
“Because, most of the time, it’s not you he’s afraid of but the way you make him feel. And this is where real talk comes back in, daughter of mine. You are permitted to be his friend. But beware of the force that you are and give the poor boy a break. He knows my rules, and I trust him to abide them, but no one can withstand you if you don’t obey them too.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose and swallowed a furious groan.
I cursed them both for talking about me.
I hated that they discussed me as if I had no control over myself just like I had no control over my life or death.
“What happened with the girl who terrified you?” Neri asked.
Jack laughed loudly, dispelling the tension and making me fold deeper into my room. “I bloody well married her.”
“Ah, see!” Neri laughed like a windchime. “I told you I’d end up marrying him.”
“I’m done. I literally...I can’t with you anymore.” The sound of a kiss smacking on Neri’s cheek echoed just before Jack’s flip-flops disappeared down the corridor, heading away from me.
I shut my door as quickly and as quietly as I could.
I rubbed at my thundering heart.
I looked at the sleep-warmed bed with its covers thrown to the side and the chest of drawers standing watch, daring me to break any of Jack’s rules.
A wash of sickly despair clutched my stomach.
The Taylors laughed about love and family, but they didn’t know what it was like to have that richness turn into such awful destitution.
Jack thought I’d told Neri she terrified me because I was a stupid sixteen-year-old boy with no morals and a shit ton of hormones, blinded to what was touchable and what was not.
But the honest to God truth was...
Neri terrified me because she threatened everything I was.
Every lesson I’d been taught and every dream I’d ever dared hope for.
She terrified me because she threatened me.
And the longer I remained in her company, I would have no choice but to change to withstand her. I’d be swept away by her hurricane, and by the time I stopped drowning, I wouldn’t have just lost my family...I’ll have lost myself.
I really should’ve taken that thought for the premonition it was.
I should’ve run from the Taylors’ kind hospitality that night.
But I didn’t.
I slipped back into bed, yanked the covers over my head, and condemned myself to everything that came next.
Chapter Twelve
*
Nerida
*
(Sea in French: Mer)
“I THINK IT’S TIME I TOLD YOU how the twelve-year-old version of myself saw Aslan Avci.” I glanced at the two reporters, already feeling younger than I had in years.
Slipping back into who I’d been was like slipping into the sea after the sun punished you on shore. It was soothing and calming and brought a welcoming sort of belonging that calmed my heart and soul.
“Did they ever find his relatives?” Dylan asked.
I shook my head. “No.”
“They literally vanished?”
“Unfortunately. Bodies tend to do that at sea.”
“You sound as if you have experience.” Dylan smirked.
I held his eyes. Remembering another body. Another disappearance. One that I was responsible for. “I have enough.” I twirled my ring, a nervous habit that’d begun on the worst day of my life.
