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“They went to counseling and my mom said she told my father that he had two choices—either stop all the cheating or leave. I think he realized he didn’t want to have my mother’s family as an enemy, considering their power and wealth in Chicago, so he stopped. My mother said that he hasn’t had an indiscretion since. I’m not sure if that’s true or not, but as long as she believes it, I guess that’s what matters.”
“Wow… wow.” She shakes her head. “I feel so bad for your mom. I know she’s an incredibly strong woman, but I didn’t realize how strong. Did she just decide after Pierce died that she was going to make the best of a bad situation with your father?”
I nod. “I’m sure it had to do with her reputation, her family’s wishes, and the fact that I was in the picture. I think she believed that staying together for my sake was more important than her desires or needs, even though I was grown.”
“I’m so sorry.” She presses her hand against my chest and I reach up and grab it, bringing it to my lips.
“What about you? Are you close to your parents?”
Her eyes shift from mine. “I was.”
“You don’t have to ta—”
“No, it’s okay. I never talk about it with anyone actually. Xana knows because she’s been there, but Carson passed away right after my mother did so he wasn’t there to be my person, my shoulder to cry on.”
Shit.Tears fill her eyes.
“My mom was diagnosed with cancer. She had zero symptoms, was super healthy and active, and then one day she felt a weird pain and it was terminal, just like that. She died less than seven months later, and then four months after that, Carson was in a tragic car accident and died on impact.”
“Oh, Daphne.” I wrap my arms around her. “I’m so sorry.” I hold her for a moment.
“Sorry, that wasn’t your question.” She lets out an awkward laugh, wiping away a few tears. “I was super close to my parents growing up. My parents were kind of the exact opposite of yours, as much as I hate to put it like that. They were high school sweethearts, soulmates, always laughing and kissing and just so happy. I didn’t think my dad was going to survive losing my mom. He became a shell of himself. I barely recognized him, and then three months after we buried my mom, he was engaged to one of her nurses and moving to Florida to get married and start over.”
“What the fuck?”
“Yeah, that was my thought as well. I was devastated and blindsided. I felt like he betrayed my mom and even though he swears that nothing was going on while she was still alive, it just didn’t make sense to me.”
“Do you believe him?”
She chews her lip. “I do, even if it sounds like I’m just in denial. I don’t think he would do that. He said he’d never been alone like that; he’d always had my mom, and the nurse, Tina, had lost her husband in the last year so she could relate. When I lost Carson, I didn’t react that same way. I didn’t run into someone else’s arms so to me, it didn’t make sense. I do realize that he and my mom were together for decades and that it’s more normal than I realized when someone loses their spouse of many years.”
“How are things between you now?”
“Better. It’s not the same but we’re working on it. I sent him a postcard from Paris and I told him I would call him when I get back from here. I have yet to go to Florida and see his new place. I’m not sure I’m ready for that.”
“I can understand that.”
“Does that make me selfish?”
“No, not at all. That makes you human.”
It feels strange to share this moment with someone. A moment where we’re both so vulnerable, sharing things that we don’t share with anyone else. Especially since we’ve only known one another for a short period. I wonder if she feels what I feel. I wonder if she’s running from her feelings of losing her fiancé and using me as shelter from them. It’s a thought that makes my stomach turn.
“Hey, what are you thinking?” She places her hands on either side of my face.
“Nothing.” The guilt of my growing feelings for her starts to rear its ugly head, a new feeling on its heels… resentment.Will I grow to resent Daphne for replacing Mira?Is that what I’m trying to do, replace her?I know it doesn’t make sense, but my brain won’t let me get around the thought.
“That doesn’t sound very convincing.” She’s staring at me, waiting for a response that I don’t give. “Did I say something? Is this because of Mirabelle?”
“What?” My eyes snap to hers. “Why the fuck would you bring her up?” My tone instantly grows sharp, making her flinch.
“I-I just thought since we were talking about our past and—”
“Did I mention her at all? No.” I stand up, moving her off me. “She is none of your business and I’m not interested in discussing her with you.” I hate that I’m reacting this way but it’s like I can’t stop it.
“But you can mention my fiancé?”
“When did I mention him?” I almost spit the wordhim.
