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“Talk,” he said.
I sighed. There was no getting out of it. “Jordan showed up at the club and kissed me.” I slipped and said his full name instead of JJ. Jordan meant emotion. Jordan was in my heart, hanging on the mess he left it.
“Senior or Junior?”
“That’s gross. You better put a bullet in me if my lips ever met JJ’s dad’s. Fuck’s sake. No. Hell no.”
He shrugged. “You said Jordan. You haven’t had anything with JJ in years.”
“No, I haven’t, and I’ve obviously done a spectacular job of handling it well.”
Xaiden went to the stove and cooked our omelets. He added a bowl of vegetables which I would hate, yet eat anyway. He put a tiny bit of sprinkled cheese on mine. He must have felt bad for me if I got the whole milk cheese I had in the fridge. “What happened?”
I told him the story of JJ showing up at the club, fighting with Simon, falling into my office then me holding him against my chest. I basically poured it all out like a faucet that couldn’t be shut off until there were no words left in me, and I was chugging my coffee like I did the liquor last night so nothing else fell from my mouth.
He brought over two plates and took a seat next to me. “He still loves you.”
“That’s debatable.”
“If he didn’t, it wouldn’t tear him up to be near you.”
“Wasn’t a fun time for me either.”
“You have to talk to him.”
“And say what exactly? How I never stopped loving him, even though there’s nothing left of my heart but tatters that have dried up? How the only time I felt half like myself was when I was buried deep in Greer? How somehow in my fucked-up mind I want both of them, yet know I don’t deserve either of them?”
He shook his head. “You don’t have to say that, but you have to say something. You can’t keep going on like this. I refuse to let you.” Xaiden focused on his omelet and ate. I did the same.
I couldn’t pick up the phone and ask JJ to stop by. And what about Greer? Were they together? Would they even want to talk to me? Shit, what would Greer think about me kissing JJ? Would he be pissed?
God, this was a disaster.
Xaiden pushed his plate aside and leaned on the counter to look at me. “I’m not leaving until they get here.”
“Oh, so now it’s they?”
“You’re obviously hung up on both of them. From what you said, they could be together. I don’t think this is as simple as talking to one or the other. Fix your shit, Dex. If you don’t, I’ll live here and become a permanent fixture at the club.” I didn’t want that for him. He had his own life. He didn’t need to babysit me. Though…
“Can you call Greer?”
Placing his hand on my shoulder, he said, “Yeah, Dex, I can.”
12
GREER
“You didn’t have to come.” I frowned and glanced over at JJ. We were in my Lexus on our way to Dexen’s home, which I’d never been to. Every time I was with him, we were in the club. JJ knew where he lived so he told me where to go. Turned out, Dexen lived near the fortress.
“I wasn’t letting you go to him alone.”
“X is there.”
“X is going to leave the second we arrive. You know him better than me, but even I know that. It will be up to us to figure out what’s going on with Dex.”
“I can’t believe he got so drunk.”
JJ snorted a laugh. “I can. The man was never good at dealing with his emotions. If he couldn’t vocalize them, he drank them. Without you or me there, or anyone he wants to talk to about it, he’ll drink.”
