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“So you did kiss her?”
Aaron huffed out his annoyance. “Yes. Happy?”
“Not really. I mean, I could be happy for you, but her kisses will only take you so far.”
“I thought you were excited about your guys settling down.”
“Only if they’re ready. You really think getting into a relationship with that woman is a good idea where you’re at?”
“We’re not in a relationship. It was just a kiss.”
“You don’t want more?”
“Stop it. I don’t want to talk about Sydney.”
“Neither do I in all honesty. I want to know what’s going on under that thin veneer of contentment. I want you to tell me when you lost faith in God.”
“It’s not that groundbreaking.”
“Okay.” Peter leaned forward, waiting for him to continue.
“It was when I was on my last undercover operation.”
“When was that?”
“Started about seven months ago. After the big shake up, they wanted me out of the picture. My presence made things complicated, so they sent me off on an assignment. I got back about a month ago.”
“It didn’t go well?”
“It went great. I got a lot of bad guys put away.”
“But something happened?”
“Not so much happened as my eyes were opened. I saw stuff. Bad stuff. At first I prayed about it, but … ” He rubbed at his eyes, then looked at Peter. “God wasn’t there. He didn’t want to be there, and I can’t say I blame him. So I did the only thing I could do. I shut myself off and did my job.”
“You did bad stuff?”
“I got close to a woman who lived there. I used her to get what I needed. I destroyed her life, or what was left of it. But I got the job done. The cost didn’t matter because no one really matters. And God wasn’t there to stop me.”
Peter nodded. “But he was there.”
Aaron stiffened. “No, Peter. He wasn’t. You weren’t there. You didn’t see what I saw.”
“You think you’re the only Christian who’s ever found themselves in the pit of hell? You think God wasn’t kneeling beside that woman wanting to heal her wounds? You really believe that it was too dark for him to reach down into the filth to pull someone out?”
Aaron pressed his hands over his ears. “Don’t, Peter. Don’t do this to me, please.”
But Peter wouldn’t relent. “You walked into a dark, dangerous place full of evil. There was no light. Not there. Not until you turned up.”
“Stop it, Peter.” His voice shook. “Please.”
“That’s why God sent you. The FBI didn’t send you. God sent you because he needed a light in that dark place. You were that light.”
Something broke inside of Aaron and he fell to his knees. Peter’s hand rested on his back.
“You turned away from God because you couldn’t face him. You’ve been too afraid to hear what he has to say about what you did.”
Aaron couldn’t catch his breath as the truth was exposed and his heart broke into a thousand pieces.
