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“I mean, rationally, I know you have to build up to that, but I’ve never given her a reason not to.”
“Sweetie, see if from her perspective.” My mom gives me a patient smile. “She was on the run from a man and a life that almost killed her. Then you run into her out of the blue, and the only thing she knows about you is you went to prison for saving her and that she ran before she could come to your defense. When you do see her again, she finds out you’re in a MC, and not the kind that rides bikes on the weekends with friends.” She pauses and arches her brow. “Why would she trust anything about you at that point?”
“She’s never been in danger with me. I’m nothing like her asshole ex.”
“No one is saying you are, sweetheart, but when you live like that—in fear every morning when you wake up because you’re scared to enrage the person sleeping next to you—it changes something in you. Not only does she not trust men in general, but she doesn’t trust herself. People like her ex tell you over and over again the reason they act like that, the reason they hurt you is because you did something wrong. You’re the problem, not them. How can she trust you enough to open up when she can’t trust herself not to fall into a situation with another man like the one she ran from?”
It makes sense, the way my mom puts it.
“How did you know you could trust Trick?”
“Oh, it wasn’t easy.” My mom laughs and shakes her head. “And I made him work for it. I think for me, it was seeing him with you boys. Do you remember when you were playing baseball in the backyard with Ozzy and Knox? You hit that ball so hard, it came right through the slider.” She points to the glass door that leads out into the yard.
“We were sitting in the living room watching a game and heard a huge crash. Trick jumped up and was so scared that something happened to one of you boys. He saw how scared you were. If we had been in Nebraska with your father, that would have sent him into a rage. But Trick? Once he saw no one was hurt, he was so impressed with your swing, he insisted I sign you up for baseball and he went to all your games. The only thing he asked was for you to practice farther away from the house.”
I remember that day. God, I remember being so scared that he was going to fly off the handle.
“When I saw how Trick encouraged you, even after breaking the window, which wasn’t cheap to replace, by the way, instead of getting pissed, I knew he would never hurt you or Knox. Or me, for that matter. Gramps and Trick thought for sure you would be a power hitting baseball player.” She smiles at the memory.
“I only played one season.”
“Yeah, Trick didn’t care much for the coach or some of the other dads. That’s one of the reasons why when Knox and Ozzy started playing football, he supported you in changing sports, too. Did I ever tell you he paid for every single season?”
I shake my head.
“Yup. I was a single mom, and you two were eating me out of house and home.” She laughs. “Trick made sure you had everything you needed.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell me that?”
“Well, at the time, he didn’t even want me to know. Janine said she and Gramps wanted to ‘sponsor’ young talent. But before Janine died, she told me a lot about what Trick did for us through the years. He didn’t want me to think I owed him something I wasn’t willing to give freely.”
After everything my mom went through with my father, I’m so fucking glad we landed in Shine. I don’t know how our lives would have turned out if she had decided to stick it out in Nebraska.
“Thanks, Mom.” I stand and bend down to kiss her cheek. “I’m sure as shit happy you found your white knight.”
“Oh, honey, he’s far from that, but he’s a good man. And he had a hand in raising three other good men.”
Getting back on my bike to head to the clubhouse, my mom’s words run through my head. Am I a good man? I’d like to think so. I may not follow the law in the traditional sense, but I follow the laws of loyalty and brotherhood. That’s more important to me than any penal code.
I will always protect my family, and Charlie needs to understand in no uncertain terms that she’s family. Shit, she’s more than that. Now, I have to figure out how much more.
Chapter sixteen
Charlie
WhathaveIdone?I basically just compared Linc to my abusive ex because he lives his life on the other side of the law. I didn’t have faith in a man who’s showed me nothing but kindness. A man who would burn his world down to protect a nineteen-year-old girl he met once in a diner, then found broken and bloody on the side of the road. That’s not a man who would turn his back on me or turn me over to my abuser for knowing a few details about his club and their less-than-legal dealings.
This man, this club, protects women. Ozzy could have retaliated against Stacia for running her mouth. If any of these men were like my ex, they would have raised a hand to her and never felt a moment of regret, but no one did. Sure, he kicked her out, but that was because she was causing problems. He didn’t beat her to hell for disrespecting him or the club.
“You okay?” Lucy asks as I listen to Linc’s bike roar away from the clubhouse.
I shake my head. “No.”
She pulls me in for a hug. “Honey, you guys will figure this out. Once he gets back, you two can talk.”
“He’s never been anything but kind to me, but I was so messed up from what Jace did that I couldn’t see past my fear.”
And now, before I had enough time to confide in him about what I’d taken from Jace and why we were in this mess, he found out from someone else. That had to have hurt. Instead of me being open with him, he found out I was keeping secrets. Instead of building something on trust and respect, he thinks I don’t trust him. For a man like him, that goes hand in hand with respect.
