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“But I settled on this.” I pull out the packet of wasabi flavored organic beef jerky. “You like spicy food and I feel like protein is something you need lots of to maintain this.” I wave a hand at his body.
“Excellent choice. One of my favorites.”
I beam with pride and clap my hands together. It feels like a test that I’m passing.
“Your turn,” I say.
He pulls out a pack of Haribo gummy bears and a bottle of Diet Coke.
“You have achieved husband level status,” I tell him as I reach for the gummy bears and soda. I pull the bag open, but hesitate. “As everyone knows not all gummy bear flavors are created equal. Which color is my favorite?”
“Red.”
“Lucky guess.”
“Luck has nothing to do with it.” He smirks, then reaches in the bag to snag a bear and toss it in his mouth.
I pop a few in my mouth, then set the gummy bears aside.
“Something you need,” I announce the next category.
Griffin pulls his selection for me out. “I got you a gel pen set.”
“I do love a good gel pen. They’re very satisfying to write with,” I say reassuringly.
“It’s so you can color in your butterfly tattoo and decide which colors you like best before you get it officially filled in.”
I stare down at the pen set, then back up at Griffin.
“Oh,” is all I can manage, because it’s so thoughtful. I recall Alec’s response to my tattoo—he hated it—and thought it was even more ridiculous that I didn’t get it finished. Like Alec being indecisive about our relationship wasn’t an issue, but if I wanted to take more time to think about what colors of ink I wanted to tattoo on my body, that was a character flaw.
Griffin must read my silence as displeasure.
“You don’t have to use them for that. It was a thought I had.”
“No, that’s a great idea. It’s so thoughtful, I was just surprised.”
“Surprised that I was thinking of you when I made my selection?”
“No, I mean that’s the point of all this, but it’s more effort than I’m used to. And that you remembered my tattoo and wanted to help me with it.”
He picks up the pen set and opens the case, then pats the counter next to him.
“Come here.”
I hop up on the counter and cross my right ankle over my left thigh to give him access.
“What colors do you want to try first?”
“Pink and purple,” I point to a bright pink and a pretty lilac color.
“Solid choices.” He uncaps the lilac pen and with my foot in his hand starts to shade in one of the butterfly wings. “Your significant other putting in effort should be mandatory. You deserve someone who will put in the effort every day for you. If this was real, I’d do that for you.”
His words fall out gently but are spoken with conviction. My ears carry them straight to my heart, wishing he didn’t preface them with ‘if this was real.’
He’s so close now, leaning into my space as he picks up the pink pen and starts coloring the inner parts of the butterfly, shading together the pink with the lilac. He smells amazing. It’s not a manufactured scent like cologne or aftershave, but a simple, yet intoxicating combination of soap and natural male scent. It’s a comforting smell that I’m starting to associate with him.
He finishes his coloring on my butterfly. I stare down at his handiwork and it makes my heart happy to see color there.
