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I’m under the water again when they both dive for me.
***
“Welcome to my world, Claire.” Rose hands me a glass of white wine as we sit on the steps leading onto the beach from the house.
The sun is setting.
It’s beautiful.
Alex and Jake are busy standing over a barbeque.
“Can I stay in your world?” I cry, breathing in the evening air.
We get lost in comfortable silence for minutes, watching the world go by. The beach is emptying and smoke plumes from the barbeque.
My mouth waters when the smell reaches us.
Jake and Alex are laughing, talking over a beer.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so relaxed.
But the same warmth is always in his eyes when his son is near.
His gaze wanders to me. He dips his chin, silently asking if I’m okay. I tip my glass.
I’m good.
Sighing, my shoulders relax as I sip my wine.
“You can hide a touch and an embrace,” Rose starts, smiling at me when I look at her. “But you can never hide a look.” The lines crinkle around her eyes.
She was watching us.
Fuck.
She strokes the top of my hand. “Don’t look so scared, love.”
But I am.
I’m petrified.
Stuttering, I swallow my wine before speaking. “It’s not what it looks—”
“It’s exactly what it looks like.”
My heart is pounding. I wipe clammy palms against the thighs of my jeans.
When I look to the sky for help, no one answers my prayer to disappear.
Why isn’t this beach covered in quicksand? I’d happily jump in.
Her eyes fix on Jake. “That man loved my baby with his entire heart. I know it because I felt it. It was impossible not to. But they were both too stubborn to admit it.”
I don’t know if I can do this.
She laughs under her breath. “For years, they masked their love as hate. But when people love so deeply, it eventually explodes.” Her next words cause everything in me to crack. “Jess died in his arms where she belonged.”
My breath catches in my throat.
