Page 62 of Desire


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“Hold out your pinkie and loop it through mine,” I instruct, the smile I’ve been fighting peeking through. Somehow I don’t think this is what the Warden planned for me to teach her. Maybe next time he should be more specific. “And say ‘I pinky swear’, while squeezing my finger. That’s all there is to it.”

“This can’t be a real thing,” she sighs, sticking out her pinky finger, waiting for the punchline.

Except I’m deadly serious, already wrapping my pinkie around hers. There’s a small tattoo that says ‘trust or die’ in small letters up that finger, but people rarely notice it. It’s a reminder of the few times that I’ve promised something.

Silla is one of those people, because her eyes are on mine as she squeezes her pinkie against mine. Leaning against the pillows on the other side of the couch, I get comfortable. I don’t want to crowd her, especially if I’m asking prying questions.

I can learn from my mistakes.

“So do you want to go first?” I ask her with a lazy smile.

“Okay…” she agrees, scooting to get comfortable. Pinching the corner of a soft blanket, I toss it over to her. The only reason we have any of these comforts is because of my sister.

Andrya keeps blankets in places all over the room, and snacks stashed throughout. It’s a classic sign that we’ve been without for a really long time.

“Your sister seemed surprised when you acted as if you were going to apologize, which leads me to believe that you don’t often,” Silla begins, and I roll my eyes.

“Boring. Is there a question in there for some time this century? Something tells me that we won’t have much time before someone comes to find you, kitten,” I drawl.

“Yes, I have a question. Why are Andrya and Sidney the only people who seem to have any kind of hold on you?” she asks. “They’re the only ones who appear to be able to pull you back when you go too far.”

“They have my leash,” I answer simply. “Sidney and Andrya’s regard for me and opinion are the only ones that matter. So when I’m going off the rails according to them, it must be pretty damn bad.”

Allowing her a moment to process that, I choose a question out of the many bouncing around in my brain.

“Why were you a virgin at twenty-four years old?” I ask, figuring I’d try something small.

Silla flushes, and I curse myself. I’m not used to being around people who are so innocent. My sister has a depraved sense of humor, and I can ask her anything. I even know how Isaac fucks because he has cute, nerd vibes, but fucks like a stallion.

“I… it was important to me. Virginity is used to barter for marriage contracts, but I never wanted any part in that. The last thing I wanted was to be married off to an old man,” she says with a shudder.

Frowning as I listen, I nod, and surprisingly she continues to talk to me.

“I didn’t want to be someone’s plaything, so I bucked the system in small ways. I picked pockets as I was forced to hang on a nobleman’s arm at parties for the evening, removed hands that strayed, fought off men who wanted more than I was willing to offer within the castle walls,” Silla explains with a shrug. “And then… I found myself in a jail cell, being called a prostitute, brought up on charges for internet hacking. Only the hacking is correct. So I made the choice between losing my virginity to someone I wanted to, or in some fucked up game only my instructors know the rules to.”

I was picking at a loose thread on the couch as she talked, and my eyes narrow angrily at her implications. Fuck, if one of our students had fucked her in one of our classes, and his dick had been drenched in her blood… I can’t imagine what I’d do.

“Who was it, Isaac?” I ask abruptly, my eyes rising to hers.

“I don’t believe that’s the way the game is played,” she says innocently, and I curse under my breath.

Isaac was pretty pissed at us, so if I had to guess, I’d bid on him.

“Okay, Kitten, your turn,” I concede.

“Why do you play such fucked up games in your classes? We can’t tell you no because FRC is a prison as well. You’re in positions of power, making us dance to your tune,” she scoffs.

“And that’s why we enjoy it,” I explain. “We’re bored, Kitten, but the Queen does demand recruits who won’t die on their first mission. So we put you through seemingly impossible exercises, both so you’ll always be on your toes and for our amusement. Sucking the soul out of my body with a good blow job is also an important skill to have,” I smirk.

Silla’s lips actually twitch in amusement and I feel pride that I put it there. Turning my body so she can’t see my growing erection, I allow myself to appreciate her beauty.

“For the record if you’d have lost your virginity by some idiot in my class instead of Isaac’s cock, he’d be dead,” I confess, shooting a shot in the dark. I don’t fight fair.

Silla’s fingers twitch violently and her breath hitches, but that’s the only evidence that I’m correct. It’s enough, and I huff in celebration.

“Is there a question in there somewhere?” she snarks back, and I decide I’m thoroughly enjoying myself.

Her nostrils flair, and I find it deeply satisfying that I’m getting under her skin in a way that’s not causing anxiety.

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