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“I know. I’m sorry. I couldn’t let them kill you.”
He growled. “You should have. You had no way to know you’d survive.”
I wanted to tell him that a part of me hadn’t, but he didn’t need that kind of guilt by knowing I’d lost my fated bond. For now, at least. I’d fight to get that back once Knox was dealt with.
“I had a better shot than you,” I replied. “And I’m safe now.”
“Where are you?” he demanded.
“Getting ready to go back to Drago.”
“Back? What do you meanback?” His panic made me smile. Not because he was suffering, but because of how much I knew he loved me.
I gave him a quick run-down of the last twenty-four hours. From my swift escape to my second near-death experience, then going to my pack before ending on a brief mention of our time with Beatrix.
“Fucking hell, D.” He sighed heavily. “Come get me. I want to be there with you. You shouldn’t be fighting this battle without your family.”
A fissure opened in my chest. Thin, but deep as fuck.
He was right, but I loved them all too much to get them involved. Not unless we had no other choice.
“We don’t even know if there’s going to be a fight,” I said.
“Bullshit,” he spat. “Tell me where you are.”
“I can’t do that, Riv. I’m sorry. I know you’re angry and scared right now—”
“You’re fucking right I’m angry,” he cut in. “My best friend was kidnapped by a psychotic dragon shifter and taken to another world, all because I let that damn warlock get the upper hand. You have no fucking clue how that feels. I’m supposed to be a protector, Dawsyn. Me. And I failed you. My best friend.”
The crack in my chest got wider, and there was an ache inside me that only continued to grow as River spoke.
I wanted to cave. I wanted to ask Beatrix to bring him to me. I wanted him here just so I could wrap my arms around him and make him feel how much I didn’t blame him for any of this shit.
“River…”
“Don’t,” he murmured. “Don’t tell me this isn’t my fault and that there’s nothing I can do. I can’t handle that right now.”
“I’m sorry. I really am. Just let me get through today and I will come for you.”
Even though I understood where his guilt and rage were coming from, I was still too selfish to put him in harm’s way.
“This isn’t fucking fair,” he said, and I pictured him running a hand through his auburn hair and yanking on the ends with frustration.
“I know.”
There was a stretch of silence between us, and I glanced up to find Cillian standing in front of his truck. There was a softening in his eyes that told me he’d heard enough of our conversation to know how I was hurting.
“I love you, Dawsyn,” River said softly. “We don’t say that enough, and even though I hate that you put yourself in danger to save me, thank you.”
“I love you, too. And I’d do it all over again if it meant keeping you alive. I won’t live in a world without my best friend.”
He grunted. “Just another realm.”
“We are a long way from sorting that out, and if Drago is where we need to be, I’ll only stay if you can visit anytime that you’re not busy hunting down the bad guys and keeping the rest of the world safe.”
“I want to be there with you now.”
I knew he did, but I wasn’t going to change my mind, so I just ignored his statement. “I need to go, but I’ll call you tomorrow and figure out a way to come see you. I promise.”
