Page 68 of Begin Again


Font Size:  

22

Say This Now

“You’re not still bothered by what Martha said, are you?”

“What?” Liz asked Christian when she unlocked the door to her house later that night. It was seven and still daylight, but it’d been a long day of setting up and cleaning after the picnic ended.

There were still plenty of people hanging out and would be for hours more, but Christian and his family picked up everything they’d set up earlier and hauled out all the trash in their trucks too. He knew that there would be maintenance checking things over on the grounds tomorrow to make sure everything was back to the way it should be.

“Martha,” he said. “You’re quiet. I asked if you were upset about what she said. You didn’t seem it at first but then got quiet as the day went on.”

She turned and put her arms around his neck. “No. I’m not upset at what she said. I expect things like that from her. From people like her. I’m quiet for another reason.”

“What reason is that?” he asked. He hadn’t been by her side the whole day. She wasn’t one that needed it and he didn’t want to hover. He’d felt like they were in a good place in their relationship, but maybe he was wrong.

“I got thinking that it’s time you knew something else and I was wondering if tonight was the right night to tell you.”

“What’s that?” he asked. “You can tell me anything. At any time. Don’t ever feel like you can’t.”

“I don’t feel that. Which is why I know it’s right to say this now.”

He started to grin. He was hoping it was what he’d been waiting to say too.

“Are you going to tell me or make me wait?” he asked.

“I used to be afraid to say things,” she said. “But I told myself I can’t be afraid anymore. I mean what’s the worst that can happen? You don’t say it back? You don’t feel the same way?”

“I’m pretty sure I feel the same way and will most likely say it back,” he said, giving her a little squeeze and kiss on the forehead.

“That I’ve gone and fallen in love with you. I didn’t know if I had it in me to fall in love with anyone again.”

“I know that feeling,” he said. “Not that I didn’t think I had it in me but that I’ve fallen in love with you too. I knew it a while ago. I think before our fight. That is what hurt so much.”

She frowned at him. “Then why did you stay away?”

“What do you mean? I told you why. That you’d been through so much. A lot of what I didn’t know. I didn’t want to put pressure on you and thought you needed your own time to work it out.”

“Would you have made the step if I hadn’t?” she asked. She moved out of his arms and he wasn’t sure what was going on now.

“Yes. I would have that weekend. You were working and I didn’t want to bother you. Or distract you. I would have reached out by Friday afternoon, no later than Saturday. Do you not believe me?”

“You didn’t reach out to me when we were younger. When I broke up with you, you just walked away like it wasn’t a big deal.”

“I don’t remember it that way,” he said.

“It’s the truth. What do you remember? I told you that I thought we should take a break. You got quiet and said if it was what I wanted and that was it. We never talked again except passing in the halls or seeing each other at parties. It just told me that was the right decision.”

He ran a hand over his face. “Liz. You blindsided me. I thought things were good with us. But we were kids. You were playing sports. You were helping your father with his business and the house. You had a part-time job and you were caring for Abby. In between that you had school and were dating me. I just thought you were being pulled in a bunch of directions.”

She was looking at him. Trying to read him. He wasn’t lying though.

“Were you upset over it?”

“I was. But I was sixteen and didn’t want to let anyone know that I was. We hadn’t said we loved each other though I cared a great deal for you. I knew a bit about your home life. Not a lot. You never said much.”

She let out a sigh. “No. There wasn’t much to say. You knew my father was raising us and everything you just said was the truth back then.”

“Was there more to the reason we broke up? I know everyone always said I changed directions with the wind. I did. I still do at times. I was hurt and don’t know what happened other than what I saw. I just assumed you wanted the break. I figured if you wanted to get back together, you’d let me know. You never did.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com