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His expression becomes introspective as he honestly considers the question before replying. I appreciate that because a perfunctory, “Oh, yes, of course I would” answer would have rung flat and disingenuous.
He takes a deep breath and says, “I obviously find you very attractive, our chemistry is phenomenal, and I long to be in your company. But dating someone outside the fold is so prohibitive and difficult that I don’t know if either of us…” He’s holding my gaze but now his hand trembles a bit as if he’s worried that his honesty may be too much for me to swallow. He repositions himself on the cushions and seems to rethink his next words. “Madison, if I’d been in a… different line of work when I met you,” he smiles and nods, “yes, we’d definitely be in a committed relationship with the distinct prospect of making it permanent.”
I interpret that as, I’m crazy about you as a person, but I don’t know if the relationship would’ve been worth all this trouble if you hadn’t also been a gifted surgeon.
That I’m a surgeon can’t be distinguished from who I am. It’s like him asking me if I’d still be in love with him if he weren’t drop dead gorgeous and rich…
Still, my spirits feel deflated. “What if I lost my license, would you still want me?”
He laughs and lifts his hands to cradle my face. “First of all, it’s too late, I’m madly in love with you. Secondly, no one’s taking your license. Thirdly, no one can take away your skills or the knowledge contained in that brilliant head of yours.” He pecks my lips. “You’ll always be a skilled surgeon no matter what, and I’m dying to be the most loving and supportive husband to you.”
I allow his tender kiss and the promise of the future together. But before I completely lose myself in it, I remember that Stieg lays there recovering from a gunshot wound that I treated. It’s a dangerous, scary road with Sebastian. He won’t come out and admit it, but with the elimination of Sergei, he’s the new head of this faction of the Russian mafia.
The only thing scarier than that prospect, is a life without Sebastian in it. But where do I draw the line?
He must sense that my heart isn’t in a very romantic place at the moment. He pulls back and says, “It’s fine, babe…why don’t we just get some sleep. Things will look much better in the morning.”
I nod, that much I can consent to. In the dark of the night, I’ll have to ask myself, how much am I willing to risk for Bash? Just how far will I go?
Chapter 24 – No Going Back Now
LornaKorbet,Stieg’swife,is pissed as hell when she learns of what happened to him. She suspects the shot was meant for me and that I provoked it by bringing Madison to the wedding so soon after ending things with Natasha.
But I have no regrets. My bold move served its purpose well. Stieg is on the mend and Madison…she’s finally understanding what it means to be my wife. Does she fully comprehend what I’m asking of her? It’s there, she knows but we haven’t discussed it explicitly. But the fact that she hasn’t attempted to bolt after the incident with Stieg is very promising.
She’s a smart woman, she must sense that she’s in too deep to turn back now. She knows how much I love her and would do anything to protect her from danger, whether it be from my enemies or from the medical board. In turn, she’ll provide her services when we need them. It’s the only way I can sell this to the powers that be back in Moscow.
She’ll be made to understand that this won’t come down to me choosing her over this life. There is no way out for me. Either I stay or I’m dead. Those are my only two choices.
I could tell she’d been troubled through the night with all of her tossing and turning. I can imagine how difficult this must be for her.
Allowing her to sleep in, I go to check in on Stieg in the morning. His pallor had improved, and a quick look at the monitor tells me that his vital signs are good. Losing Stieg would’ve been a tremendous blow. There’s no one I trust more than him. He’d been one of my father’s crew, but a bit too young to have been one of his captains at that time. At fifteen years my senior, Stieg’s been more like a big brother than a father figure. Second to Nick, he’s the closest thing to family I have.
Thank God Madison patched him up better than new and he’ll not miss a beat. As I sat there in the chair, his eyes flutter open and his gaze drifts over to me. An understanding passes between us, he knew I’d get him through this and that he’d be alright.
“Hey man, how’re you feeling?”
He manages a weak smile. “Like…I was hit…by a bazooka.”
“Nine milliliter slug.”
He turns to look down at the bandages. “Madison?”
“Yeah.”
“Bullet’s out?”
“Yep, she removed it and patched you up good.”
He nods. “Water?”
I hop up out of my chair. “Yeah, sure.” I grab a bottle of water, pour some into a plastic cup and place a straw in it.
He attempts to sit up but grimaces.
“Stay put,” I order and lift the bendy straw to his lips. “There ya go,” I say when he takes a few sips. “Lorna is on her way. Originally, I told her you had a few too many and crashed at my place. This morning, I told her the truth.”
He chuckles and winces. “How pissed is she?”
