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Scott’s words echoed in my mind.
Not everything is about Jake. You have to let that shit go.
“You don’t get to minimize my pain just because you had a replacement,” I hissed at her, furious now.
“What?” She paled. “Do you think losing my mom hurt less because I had Rachel to look after me? You have Scott, how is this any different!”
“Scott isn’t Jake.”
“Rachel isn’t my mom!”
“Then why are you so twisted up about her sickness?”
When the words left my mouth, I knew how fucked up it sounded and that I was being completely unfair. Mackenzie pursed her lips, her eyes spewing fire at me, but in them there was pain, too.
“I guess we really are on opposite sides here,” she said. She looked like she wanted to cry. “May the best man win.”
“I plan to,” I said coldly.
“Sorry about that,” Johnson said, walking in. Toussaint followed behind him. “And we’re all gathered now, too. Let’s get started, shall we?”
I watched Toussaint. He oozed confidence, and he knew he was here because he was damn good at his job. He had a product that was highly coveted, and knowing that he had the final say gave him an air of arrogance that would have been irritating if it wasn’t the big break my company needed if I got this contract.
Toussaint smiled broadly at both of us.
“I’m excited about what’s going to come of this working relationship,” Toussaint said when he shook Mackenzie’s hand first and then mine. “Monsieur Johnson has a lot of good things to say about both of you. I’m spoiled to have a choice and not forced to take something because there is nothing else.”
“I’m sure we’ll find exactly what you’re looking for,” Johnson said smoothly.
God, what a suck-up. I’d never liked the jerk, and Elecoms had been a thorn in my side. It was only now that working with them would catapult me to the next level that I saw them as an equal and not just a pain in my ass. I’d always seen them as a pretentious company that sucked up to the big guys to get somewhere rather than through sheer talent.
I guess that was still true, considering they were sourcing out the good stuff to either Mackenzie or me.
Me, in this case. I had it in the bag, and I knew it.
I glanced at Mackenzie, feeling like shit that we’d fought, but a part of me had switched off, and right now, it was all about winning. That was all I had left, anyway. It was all that fucking mattered when everything else always seemed to crumble in my life.
Mackenzie glared at me before she offered Toussaint a warm smile. I stared daggers at her, furious at her, furious at myself. This was exactly what I was scared of—that the person I had, the person I cared about, would slip away, and I’d be left with nothing. If I lost this contract, and I’d already lost her, then I had nothing. If I got the contract, I’d still have my work, and I didn’t care how everyone kept telling me I was being ridiculous for fighting on about something long gone. It was my right to feel the way I felt.
“Who’s going first?” Johnson asked.
“I’ll go first,” Mackenzie said, volunteering.
I watched her stand, turning on the projector that streamed from her laptop, and she started talking about the way the world worked, the way beauty was embedded in everything, the way we could find it if we just looked hard enough.
She had a point. I understood what she meant, and the way she looked at things was awe-inspiring, to say the least. I’d felt that way about it when she’d explained it to me the first time, too, talking about stars and dreams.
She was fucking good at her job, and she would have gotten this contract easily.
If I’d let her.
I’d felt like a dick about doing this to her, sabotaging her future, forcing her to give up the spot that she would probably have gotten… until a couple of minutes ago. Now, I was pissed off. I was so furious about what she’d said to me about Jake, and the combination of my stewing anger and the alcohol that still ran through my blood created a blend of resentment that overshadowed everything else.
“That’s why I think if we look at the bigger picture, then you’re going to get the attention you want, Mr. Toussaint,” Mackenzie said in conclusion to her presentation.
It had been spectacular. It had just been for the wrong kind of advertisement, the original brief, not what Johnson had forwarded me after that.
Johnson and Toussaint were silent, mulling over what Mackenzie had said.
