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“Whatever it is that draws me to you, it’ll never let me go. And I’ll never let you go because of it. I’m selfish enough to own that. Whether you’re afraid of me or not, you’re not going anywhere. Whether you want to be or not, you’re mine. But what’s even more fucking terrifying than that, Triss, is that you have me. I’m at your disposal now. Whatever you need, whatever you want. All you ever have to do now is say it, and I’ll put my whole fucking life into making sure it happens. And you can use that power however you want.”
“You’re really just doing this for me,” she said.
She hadn’t asked it.
I watched the realization hit her like a hurricane. I’d never just leave Memphis here alone if this concerned only me. I’d never leave Memphis’ safety in the hands of some other fucking Executioner. I’d never abandon Memphis in the middle of bringing this shit show to a conclusion. But if running away to hide for a minute was what Trista needed to feel safe, for the chance to be happy, I’d walk us both right off the edge of the Earth just so we’d land where no one could find us.
* * *
Memphis hadn’t returned to her usual post at the kitchen island by the time Trista and I made it back into the house.
“Where is she?” I asked the weird kid who’d moved in and apparently never planned to leave.
“Out by the pool,” Indy said.
“You want me to come with you?” Triss asked.
I just shook my head. I wanted Memphis to be able to tell me whatever it was that she’d been keeping hidden all this time, and I didn’t have much faith in that happening if there was an audience.
I almost couldn’t force myself to sit beside her on the edge of the pool just because I couldn’t stop picturing that punk sitting out here with her in the middle of the night. What the fuck would they have even been talking about? And why? I sat on the other side of where’d he’d been and took my shoes off too.
“You know that window behind us is my room,” I said, because I couldn’t help myself. Memphis glanced over her shoulder to look at the house before she laughed when she figured out what I was getting at.
“He’s harmless, Jersey Boy.”
But I could’ve lived my entire fucking life without having to see the way that she smiled after she’d said it.
“Well,” she added quickly. “He’s really not harmless, but he’s nice to me.”
I suddenly needed a refresher in those breathing techniques that my wife had been taught before going into labor with our daughter.
“Trista’s on board with leaving,” I said to change the subject. I watched Memphis suck her bottom lip in between her teeth.
“Are you out here to tell me goodbye then?” She asked.
“I’m out here because I still want you to come with us.”
“I can’t.”
“Why, boss lady? This thing with the President can’t be that important. That organization will still be here for you to rip apart later when we can all come back together after things have cooled off.”
“Jersey —.”
“You can even tell those other two jokers that they can come too, Memphis. I’m not fucking inviting them, but if you want to —.”
“I have a sister here, Jersey,” she whispered. “I can’t leave.”
The plethora of questions that flooded my brain all at once left me dazed and unable to ask even a single one of them.
“Then we’ll take her too,” I offered instead of questioning her to death.
She laughed, but she shook her head.
“It’s really not that easy. We don’t speak. I’ve been funding her life from a distance for years to make sure she’s cared for and safe. But the family I left her with, I told them to try to convince her that she never actually had a sister. I figured she had a better chance at a normal life if I just disappeared and stayed away. By this point, she probably thinks I’m an imaginary friend that her brain created to help her through the bad days. Sometimes you’re really not in control of the way that your mind reacts to trauma, you know?”
“Yeah,” I chuckled. “I know a thing or two about that.”
“You should go, Jersey Boy. Give yourself another chance to be happy. I never would’ve told you to go back into that building for Trista the first time if I didn’t want you to be happy with her. I’ll be okay here.”
