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Idon’t know why I just opened up to Willow like this. But I did. And for some strange reason it feels right.
Her pretty blues softening, she says quietly, “Damn, I’m sorry. Can I ask what happened?” When I hesitate, she quickly amends, “Never mind. You don’t have to say anything.”
She waves her hand, like we can just stop here, but I catch it and reply, “No. I want to tell you what happened.”
I let go of her hand, and she lowers it to her lap. “Okay.”
Releasing one long-ass breath, I then share with her how my first heartbreak occurred when I was twenty.
“And yes, I was young.” I sigh again. “But at the time, I thought she was the one.”
“Did she cheat on you?” she asks softly. “Is that why it ended?”
I know why her head is going there, as that’s what that asshole Liam did to her.
What a prick.
But my story is different.
“No.” I shake my head. “She just up and left one day, like out of the blue. We had just moved into a townhouse together. About a month later, I came home from an away game and found that all of her things were gone. She left a note on the table, telling me she wanted to break up. That was really all the explanation I ever got. I tried to contact her and ask for a reason or reasons, but she just said she had none. She simply felt it was time to move on.”
Willow shakes her head, the pretty curls she has in her hair today bouncing. “Wow, that’s terrible,” she says.
I laugh humorlessly. “Right? And as for cheating, that’s what the next one did. I was twenty-four and finally back in a serious relationship. Then I found out she was having a fling with another hockey player. That was obviously the end of that.”
Reaching over, Willow rubs my shoulder. Not in any kind of a flirty way, just a consoling type of touch, like you’d do for a friend.
With her hand still on me, she says, “I’m sorry, Arden. I understand now why you feel the way you do about relationships. But…” She pulls her hand back, like she just remembered we don’t really touch each other. Resting it on her knee, she asks, “Do you think you’ll ever change your mind?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Maybe, maybe not. I sometimes think I’m just destined to live a life alone.”
She pshaws, “Oh, stop. Don’t say that. Someday, someone you’re meant to be with will come along. Then everything will change. You’ll see.”
Slowly, I look over at her, and our eyes meet.
What if she’s right?
What ifshe’sthe one?
I mean, my feelings for her are strong. I can honestly say I care about her as a person. We’ve become friends, and the attraction we had from the beginning is still there. But most importantly, it’s stunning how unbelievably comfortable I am with her.
It’s wild, but I feel so fucking good around her, like really amazing. The idea that we could develop into something more feels fuckingright.
But no, I can’t be lulled into complacency.
Also, I don’t want to ruin what we’ve built—a true friendship.
That, in and of itself, is hard to find.
So this conversation has to end.
I point up to the muted TV, where thankfully some highlights are being played, and say, “Hey, check it out. They’re showing some outcomes from the late games out west.”
Looking relieved to let the conversation go as well, Willow unmutes the TV and says, “Oh, cool. Let’s see what happened.”
Thank God, that gets things back to normal.
We watch the updates, and then we decide that instead of me taking off, we should stream a movie.
