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Slowly, Jack came around the table and sat beside me, placing the platter away from Neri’s diamond painting.
I tracked him the entire way.
I glowered as he reached over and patted my balled hand on the table. “You’re hurting, Aslan.”
It was my turn to freeze.
What the fuck?
How did he know?
How much did he already know about me and Neri—
Licking my lips, I swallowed hard. “I don’t know what you’re—”
“You’re missing your family, mate. I see it as plain as day in your eyes.” He winced and leaned back as Anna sat down and handed out plates for the creamy, flaky desserts. “I always forget that this time of year would be the hardest for you.”
“I’m fine, Jack.”
“It’s okay not to be fine, you know.” He studied me. “I lost my parents when I was fairly young too. Car crash when they were driving down to Sydney. But you already know that. I’ve told you. In fact, you know a lot about us, yet...” He sighed. “We still don’t know a hell of a lot about you.”
I fought my rising temper. “You know everything there is to know about me.”
“From sixteen to twenty-two, yes, I’d say we know you better than anyone. But before that...you’re not exactly an open book.” He smiled sadly. “Do you want to talk about them? Talk about what you and your sister would do on Christmas—”
“We didn’t celebrate.”
“Oh...well, what did you celebrate?”
The rocks were back in my throat, spilling into my heart, creating a landslide that crushed every piece of me. “Let’s just focus on today, okay?”
“You should talk about them, Aslan,” Anna said kindly. “Make them come alive from your memories.”
“My memories already haunt me. I don’t need to give them any more ammunition.”
“But if you just talked about them—”
“I’d have to relive what happened.”
“You could start to heal,” Jack said.
“I am healed. I’m fine.”
Neri huffed but wisely stayed quiet.
Jack and Anna shared a look before Anna murmured, “Melike...that means queen in Turkish, right? That’s so pretty—”
“I-I can’t do this.” I shot to my feet and raked both hands through my hair. “I’m not...eh. I’m not feeling so good.” Stalking from the table, my ears rang as Neri said, “Leave it alone, Mum. You know how he feels about talking about them.”
I didn’t wait to hear Anna’s reply.
I stormed into the house and grabbed another beer, all while the clouds of blackness roiled through me, grumbling with thunder, churning with grief.
I felt the ghost of my father urging me to apologise.
I felt my mother telling me it was okay to hurt.
And I felt my sister—the little girl I didn’t share a single drop of blood with—urging me to go out there and tell them everything.
