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I hesitated for a moment, afraid I’d urge Travis to give in to my… more primal urges if we got closer. I wanted things to last with him, to differ from my usual “fuck and flee” routine, as Leigh called it. Part of me was afraid if I gave in too soon, we’d lose the special thing between us. Eventually, I caved in and rolled to face him. Our gazes met and we stared into each other’s eyes for a few moments. The only sounds in the tent were our soft breaths and the patter of rain hitting the tent. My chest tightened, my heart swelling, and I couldn’t take it anymore. I leaned in and kissed him. The kiss was tentative at first—I remembered his reluctance from earlier in the day and I didn’t want to push his boundaries—but it quickly evolved into something deeper, more needy and desperate.

We lay next to each other, tongues slipping together, every hot breath of Travis’s echoing in my ears. He moved his hand to my neck and gripped me, holding me close to him. I put my hand on his hip before sliding it to grip his thigh. Travis let me hitch his leg up onto mine and a moment later, I pulled him closer. He eagerly moved toward me and we rolled until he was on top, straddling my waist. I slid my hands up his back, under his shirt, and hooked my fingers into the waistband of his jeans, pulling him down against my body. Travis moaned softly into my mouth, his breath hitching as he inhaled.

I groaned as his hips rocked against mine, both of us hard and aching for contact. I wanted him. It had been so long since I’d done anything besides solo sessions, and Travis seemed to want me as much as I wanted him. My heart pounded, blood rushing in my ears as I gathered the courage to try again. Slowly, I eased one hand between us, reaching for his erection. Travis stilled the moment my fingertips brushed his cock and I pulled it away the second my brain received the signal.

“Sorry,” I murmured against his lips. “I’m sorry.” It had felt right, had seemed like the right moment to take things to the next step, but clearly I’d misread the situation. Shame and embarrassment burned hot in my face and I was glad it was too dark for him to see the redness I knew was there.

He shook his head slowly. “Don’t be. It’s just…” Travis pulled back and sat up, still straddling my legs, before slowly climbing off and lying against my side, rolling so he faced away from me. My heart rate slowly returned to normal, my chest aching as I tried to calm my breathing. Travis was so quiet for so long, I was sure he’d fallen asleep or decided not to say anything else. After an eternity, Travis cleared his throat.

“I need to tell you something.”

Chapter Twelve

Travis

“O…kay.”Parker’sresponsewas hesitant.

I rolled to face him again, wondering if he could see the streaks of tears on my cheeks in the darkness. I hoped not. The words were on my tongue, filling my mouth, but I couldn’t make myself speak them.

“What is it?” His voice was tight, as if he were in pain.

I knew I needed to just say it, to get it over with, to rip off the bandage. I took a deep, shuddering breath. “I’m a virgin.” Nausea threatened to overtake me, acid rising in my throat.

“Oh.” He hesitated a moment. “Is that all?”

A nervous laugh bubbled up out of me. “Is that all? I’m a thirty-year-old gay man and I’m a virgin. It feels like a lot.”

He chuckled softly. “Yeah, but…” He lifted a hand and rubbed it over his shaved head. “I thought you were going to back out of the wedding or something.”

“You still want to get married, even knowing that?”

“Yeah, of course I do.” He said it as if it were obvious.

My mind reeled. “But you’re… you know.” I shrugged.

“A slut?” He raised his eyebrows, the gesture barely visible in the darkness.

I laughed and shook my head. “Not what I was going to say.”

“What, then?”

“I don’t know. More experienced. I’m sure you’ve had past boyfriends you’ve slept with, right?”

Parker shook his head, to my surprise. “Not boyfriends.”

I frowned, furrowing my brow. “No?”

He exhaled slowly. “I’ve slept with a lot of people, sure. My friends would definitely say I’m a slut or a player or whatever you want to call it. But I haven’t had a lot of boyfriends. I haven’t had any, really.”

My stomach twisted in knots. “Really?” Was he going to do the same to me then? Once we slept together—ifwe slept together—would he run away? Or… would he want to have other partners? The thought that Parker might want to have sex with a lot of people that weren’t me made my stomach churn. I didn’t have an issue with people who slept around, but I wanted Parker all to myself. “So, you’re saying you like to sleep around.” It was a statement rather than a question. I needed to know.

He shrugged, a smile on his lips. “Sure, I did in the past. But Travis, I haven’t slept with anyone since this…” He gestured between us. “Since we started this thing.”

“You haven’t?”

Parker shook his head. “I told you that earlier.”

“Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

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