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“No,” Cam murmured. “Not always. A lot of times you are, but these days you seem much happier talking about wedding planning than checking out guys and hooking up in the parking lot.”
“I don’t hook up in the parking lot,” I protested.
“I can count at least six times you have,” Theo said. “There’s one now.” He tipped his beer bottle at a muscular blond guy across the room, and I scowled.
“Have you slept together yet?” Jared asked.
“None of your business.”
Jared held up one hand in surrender. “I’m only asking because you always walk away after you sleep with someone. I don’t want to see you lose this one.”
My cheeks heated against my will and I looked at the table rather than meet anyone’s gaze. “We didn’t sleep together.” They met my insistence with scattered laughter.
“Okay.” Jared’s voice was thick with skepticism.
“Wedidn’t. We’ve pretty much only kissed. We’re taking it slow.”
“That doesn’t sound like you,” Levi said.
“Ibelieve you,” Bennett said quietly. Everyone turned to look at him.
“Why’s that?” Cam asked, eyebrows raised.
Bennett smiled softly. “Because it’s obvious that they’re in love.”
My stomach flipped at the suggestion.Am I?I scowled, despite the heat that coiled in my stomach.
“Look at you.” Bennett picked up his beer and sipped it. “You were practicallyglowingtelling us about the wedding. You were late for practice—and you’reneverlate for practice. Besides, you always tell us if you’ve slept with someone. You don’t exactly stay tight-lipped about these things. You’re smitten.”
Guilt crept through me over my previous kiss-and-tell policy. I sighed and slumped in my chair. The fight had gone out of me. I shrugged. “So what? He’s going to be my husband. I’d better fucking be in love with him. If I wasn’t, we’d have much bigger problems, wouldn’t we?”
They all agreed and to my relief, the subject changed to the game on T.V.
Hours later, I headed home alone, and when I stepped into the empty house, my chest squeezed and tears sprang to the corners of my eyes. I stopped and pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes, groaning in frustration.
“What iswrongwith me? I hardly know this guy,” I said into the void. With no answer forthcoming from the empty house, I undressed and crawled into bed, acutely aware of how alone I was.
The next day was Sunday, and I mostly paced the house, useless. I worked on some designs for Amante Bay. I cleaned a little and then took an incredibly long shower. There was nothing in my house that could keep my attention, but I didn’t want to call Travis and pester him if he was Parkered-out. I wanted to give him some space, so I left him alone all day. Finally, well after the sun had set, I gave my brother a call. The phone rang twice before he answered.
“Hey man. What’s going on?”
I exhaled loudly and flopped down on the couch. “I don’t know. Not much. How about you?”
Karl chuckled, and there was some shuffling on the line. “Marissa and I are just hanging out, watching a movie. Did you—did you need something?”
I had always gone to my brother for advice, just like he had come to me. We’d been tight growing up, considering we were three years apart in age, and kept practically nothing from each other. “I—yeah. I need to tell you something.”
“Just a sec.” There was another noise, like he was covering the mouthpiece, and I heard his muffled voice and then Marissa’s before he came back to the line. “Okay, shoot.”
“Are you still sitting next to Marissa? I don’t know if I want her to hear everything I have to say.”
“Nope, I went into the bedroom. Now, what’s going on?”
I paced around the house as I talked. “I need to tell you something about Travis.”
“You guys break up or something?”
“No,” I said a little too loudly. I cleared my throat and consciously tried to lower my volume. “Definitely not. I… may not have been completely honest about our relationship when we first announced our engagement.”
