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Sol snorted. “Nice try.” He closed the cabinet. “Come on up to my room. We won’t be disturbed in there.”
Butch followed him up the stairs, unable to tear his gaze away from the cage in Sol’s hand.
How is that gonna feel? Will I be aware of it all the time? How long do I have to wear it? Can I pee while it’s on?
And underneath all the questions there was a ripple of anticipation, excitement, and maybe a little trepidation.
If someone had told me I’d be doing this—andwantingto do this—I’d have laughed my ass off.But he couldn’t deny everything Sol had gotten him to do had been so damn good. And when Sol said it would be worth trying, Butch believed him.
Butch trusted him.
Hell, it was more than trust, and Butch knew it.
Something had shifted inside him, and for the first time, sex wasn’t a cure-all. It wasn’t just a case of getting off, or a distraction from the guilt that had plagued him. And a big part of that shift was to do with Sol.
The previous night, he’d lain in Sol’s bed, Sol’s arms around him, and while it had felt so fuckingright, what had come to mind was the strangeness of it all. Not only strange, but scary too.
I never felt like this about anyone, not even Diana.
Theirs had been a physical relationship, and they’d both known that. Butch had been fond of her, sure, but hell, he’d been twenty-one, twenty-two, and what had filled his mind every time she’d been around had been lust, pure and simple. Race had been a good friend, albeit one with benefits, but again, there hadn’t been thisconnectionhe felt with Sol.
The connection that scared the fuck out of him.
Butch prided himself on being open and communicative with his coworkers and the boss, but as for sharing his true feelings? Hell no. Yet here he was, yearning to be open and honest with Sol, but at the same time, scared of the consequences if he spoke out.
What would I say to him? ‘Sol, I never cared about anyone the way I care about you. And I don’t want this to end. It’s way more than all the stuff you’re showing me, teaching me…I know you have to leave, but I need to know you’re coming back. Or that I can come see you.’
All of which he could sum up in six words.
I think I’m falling for you.
Not that Butch would recognize such feelings. He’d never fallen for anyone, and he hadn’t thought it would happen for him.
The fact that it had?
Butch didn’t know if he was elated or scared shitless. And until he got the slightest indication from Sol that his feelings might be reciprocated, he was keeping his damn mouth shut.
Sol closed the door. He’d been thinking about the upcoming conversation all the way home from Bozeman.
I have to find a balance between sharing too much and not enough.
With a little more than four days before he had to leave, he wasn’t about to cover all the guidelines, protocols…
Butch doesn’t know yet if he wants this.
Sol’s task was to give him enough to enable him to come to a decision.
Butch stood beside the bed. He had an air about him, a kind of what-am-I-doing-here? vibe, so unlike the man who’d blanked him all those weeks ago.
That’s because he isn’t the same man.
It felt as though Butch had done more than change—he’d evolved. And Sol was about to help him take a few more steps along the path he was following at present.
The problem was, Sol wanted to be around when Butch reached the end of the path, but that wasnota good idea. The more time he spent with Butch, the more convoluted his feelings became.
This is about opening new doors for Butch.
Except Butch was the one who’d opened a door, one Sol had thought was closed, the lock rusted beyond repair, and the key lost, never to be found again.
