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Sitting back, she lowers her hands and takes Addy’s in hers, holding onto her little sister. Jack clears his throat again and reads aloud.
Dear Andrea and Addy,
I’d hoped it wouldn’t come to this. I wanted to do this in person, no matter how hard that would’ve been. You and Addy deserved that from me. Forgive me for what I’m about to write. I kept you both in the dark to protect you, but none of us can afford to do that anymore. It’s time to tell the truth. The whole truth.
I NEVER wanted it to be this way. Never. I did everything in my power to shield both of you, but it wasn’t enough. IF you’re reading this letter, it means I’m gone.
I’m so fucking sorry for all of it. For the pain, the silence, the way I acted when Christopher hired the hitman and went after you. I should’ve done something then, but I didn’t have what I needed. There wasn’t enough evidence, but I should’ve done more to protect you.
You already put together what started all this on your own after the news broke of Tessa O’Connor. It’s all true. What you don’t know is how much Malcom helped.
So, here’s the truth, every last fucked up piece of it.
Christopher came home drunk and panicking from a party one Saturday night. He had a bloody nose and scratches all over his face, which he refused to talk to me about. The next thing I know, Malcom shows up and hauls him out of our apartment.
At first, I’d thought Christopher had a wreck in my car, and Malcom came out to clean it up for him. I was pissed when Malcom said my car was totaled, but he promised he’d get me a new one. I didn’t think much of it since Christopher was always getting himself into trouble back then.
This is the part I hate myself the most for. I knew, but you didn’t, and it affected all our lives. I thought by keeping you in the dark, I could better protect you, but all it did was allow you to be a pawn in Malcom’s sick game. I’ll never forgive myself for it.
I didn’t put anything together until news broke that Tessa, a girl Christopher saw off and on, was missing. I panicked when I put together the timeline of what night she went missing and when Christopher came home, disheveled and bloody. I turned it over in my head for nearly a week. I just couldn’t fathom that he could’ve been responsible, or that Malcom helped cover it up.
Christopher’s only response when I confronted him was, “Talk to your father.” No denial. No anger that I would accuse him of something so awful. No emotion on his face. That’s when I knew he did it. I didn’t need to talk to my father.
Believe me when I say this. I had every fucking intention of going to the police. I almost went there first, but I wanted to hear it from Dad. I needed that confirmation before I turned my best friend in for murder. I needed Dad to tell me why he hadn’t done it himself. Why he would help Christopher instead of helping that poor innocent girl.
I needed answers, so I went to the man I’d admired all my life until that point. Yeah, he could be distant growing up. He wasn’t warm, but he was our dad. How could he do this to us? To Tessa?
I should’ve gone to the police first. If I had, maybe all the rest of this wouldn’t have happened.
At first, he denied everything and said I imagined things. It was a coincidence. I pushed back though, and that’s when the facade dropped. That’s when I saw father for who he truly is. A monster.
He said he would make both your lives miserable if I didn’t keep my mouth shut. He said I had to sacrifice my dream of becoming a doctor and follow after him. Stay in line, and he would leave the two of you be. You could go and do whatever you wanted, be whoever you wanted, and he would let you. As long as he had… me.
I went along with it like he knew I would. It wasn’t even a choice for me as long as he left you two alone. That was our agreement for years.
I wasn’t happy, but it could have been so much worse. He made sure I never forgot how in control he was. How miserable he could make us all. It was a sacrifice I was willing to keep making over and over again.
Up until he pushed you and Christopher together.
That was the final straw. I couldn’t believe my eyes as I watched it happen, and you were none the wiser. That was my fault. If I’d said something, anything, then maybe we could have changed it all.
I hired a PI and learned Malcom helped Christopher get rid of her body and cover up the evidence, but I didn’t know the extent of Malcom’s involvement, and I couldn’t prove anything.
As it turned out, the evidence I needed was my car that Christopher borrowed that night. The one thing that Malcom had as leverage against me. When I demanded he put a stop to your relationship with Christopher, that I wouldn’t be his puppet, he threatened me. I looked back at the man who was supposed to be my father, and all I saw was a money hungry, evil monster who would do anything in his power to control us all.
That was the point when I realized we were all well and truly fucked, and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. All I had on him so far was theories and hearsay. Nothing I could nail his ass with.
He said he’d say it was me driving that night. It was me out with Tessa. It was me who tried to rape her. Me who ran her down.
I didn’t care what happened to me at that point. I knew my life was over whether I was in jail or not. I told him to go fuck himself. I was done. He could turn me in if he wanted, but I wouldn’t keep his dirty fucking secrets anymore. I planned to tell you and Addy everything.
Please believe me when I say nothing I ever did was to hurt you or Addy. Quite the contrary. Everything I did was to try to protect you.
But then he said something that altered my course entirely, preventing me from going to the police as I’d planned.
“You wouldn’t want what happened to poor little Tessa O’Connor to happen to one of your sisters, would you?”
I turned and looked directly into the face of evil. He told me not to underestimate him, that I wouldn’t be the only one to pay if I went to the police. There was no way I’d risk the two of you for anything, and he damn well knew it.
