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I took my phone and called Kye.
“Baby Doll? Your dad okay?” he asked, sounding worried.
“Yes. He’s resting. Could you and Jagger come over here, please?” I asked him.
He was silent for a moment.
“She knows?” he finally asked.
“Yeah. She saw the baby stuff being dropped off.”
He sighed. “On our way,” he replied, then ended the call.
Mom put her cup to her lips as she stared at me over the rim. “It’s Kye’s then? That’s why he’s there. You’re helping him. I’d ask about the mother, but I’m guessing she’s one of those wild women he always messes around with. She didn’t want the baby.”
How my mom could pull all of that together with the short conversation I’d had with Kye, I didn’t know. Maybe it was just that the older you got, the more you saw and understood.
I stood up. “I’m going to go let them in. But yes. Everything you said is correct.”
Mom shook her head, looking worried. “Poor baby. Didn’t ask to be brought into this world, and then his momma just left him.”
I nodded. “Yes, she did. She’s a horrible, selfish person.”
I turned and went to the door just before Kye and Jagger appeared on the steps. He looked up at me. I could see he wasn’t sure what to expect, but hadn’t questioned me about bringing Jagger over.
“I want her to see him. She’ll understand my decisions better,” I whispered as he reached the door.
“Do you want me to stay?” he asked.
“Yes. Of course.”
The pleased expression on his face wasn’t what I’d expected. I had assumed he would want to escape my mom and the questions. I left Jagger in his arms and led them into the kitchen.
“Mom, this is Jagger Henley Levine, at least as soon as his last name is officially changed,” I said to her, then stepped aside.
Kye took Jagger over to stand in front of Mom.
Her eyes softened, and I saw them well with emotion as she looked at him. She held out her hands and took him from Kye.
“Oh, he looks like you,” she said to him with awe in her voice.
Jagger stared up at her and lifted his little hand to reach for her hair.
“Be careful. He likes to pull long hair in his attempt to eat it,” I warned her.
Mom laughed and placed her finger in his hand instead. “You are a handsome little man. Yes, you are,” she cooed at him.
Jagger kicked happily and studied her face, waiting for her to say more.
“Tell me about custody and his future,” Mom said, not glancing up to look at either of us.
Kye’s gaze swung to meet mine. Was he wanting me to tell her? I wasn’t sure anymore. Kye hadn’t even mentioned the birth certificate, custody, or finding him parents.
“I have full custody,” he said, still looking at me. “The birth certificate now has my name as the father, and his last name is officially Levine.”
I hadn’t known that. When had he gotten that done? Why hadn’t he mentioned it? I felt panic grip me as I waited for his next words. Was he already in the process of finding parents for Jagger?
I couldn’t breathe, I realized. I gripped the edge of the table and tried to draw air into my lungs.
“So, you are going to raise him?” my mother asked.
There was a whooshing noise in my head as I fought to inhale. I wasn’t ready for this. He was going to give Jagger away. How could I let him do that? Jagger was mine. Ours.
“I know he needs a mom and dad. A stable home. I want him to have it all. To be loved and cherished. I want him to know he is loved and wanted,” Kye said.
My eyes lifted to look at him as they began to burn.
Don’t do this to me. Please, I can’t take it.
I had known this day was coming, but I wasn’t going to be able to handle it. Suddenly, I bolted from the room and ran to the back door and rushed outside into the night air. Bending over, I grabbed my thighs, digging my nails into them as I sucked in oxygen. Tears rolled down my face, and through the blur, I saw them splash onto the wooden flooring of the porch.
“Baby Doll!” Kye’s voice sounded as frantic as I felt.
I couldn’t look at him. I wasn’t ready to face him. Hear him tell me what he had planned for Jagger. I didn’t care how wonderful the family was or how much they were going to love him. Yes, I was being selfish, but he was mine. I’d fallen in love with him so completely. That sweet little face staring up at me as I fed him and rocked him. How would I just let that go? Never experience it again?
“I want him!” I blurted out, standing up and finally looking at Kye. “Don’t give him to someone else. I want him, Kye.”
