Page 65 of Burn (Smoke)


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“Baby Doll,” he started, and I shook my head.

“No!” I shouted. “Do not tell me why I can’t have him. Don’t!”

He reached for me, and I took a step back, holding up both my hands.

“Baby Doll, I’m not giving him away,” he said slowly.

I stilled, staring at him, unsure if I heard him correctly. “You’re not?” I asked, almost afraid that I’d hallucinated that.

“I’m not.”

I pointed at the house. “But what you said in there to Mom.”

“What I said in there was that I wanted him to be loved and cherished. To know he was wanted. I might not live the ideal life to raise a kid, but neither did my dad, and I wouldn’t have wanted any other parents. I never felt unwanted or unloved. Sure, I lived most of the time with my mom, but the family was a huge part of my life too. I can be Jag’s dad. He’ll know I love him and that I want him.”

I wiped at the tears on my face as I listened to Kye. He was serious. He wanted Jagger. He was going to rearrange his life for his son.

“I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, and I wasn’t going to ask you to keep helping us like you have been. I spoke with Trinity, and she wants to help me. Keep him when I’m working. She’s excited about it. I just didn’t know how and when to tell you. Then, Bowie did what he did, and I wanted to be with you. Make sure you were okay.”

His words felt as if he’d reached into my chest and pulled my heart out. I knew he hadn’t meant to, but he was slowly killing me with every word he spoke. I turned away from him and reached for the railing to steady myself. He wasn’t giving Jagger away, but he was taking him away from me. I was still losing him.

I hung my head and tried to process the sheer agony gripping me. This was never supposed to hurt this bad. I had known from the beginning that I wouldn’t get to keep Jagger. But I’d grown attached. So very attached.

When Kye’s hand touched my back, I jerked. I didn’t want him touching me. Which was a feeling I’d never experienced. Normally, where Kye was concerned, I wanted to be near him.

“Talk to me,” he said gently.

I sucked in a deep breath. “I can’t right now. It hurts too much.”

He wrapped his arms around me and held me against his chest. I didn’t have the energy to fight it.

“What hurts?”

Did he really need me to spell that out for him?

I closed my eyes tightly. “I’m still losing him.”

Kye grabbed my waist and turned me around to face him. “No, you are not losing him. What makes you think that?”

My bottom lip pouted, and I couldn’t even stop myself. I was doing all I could not to cry some more. “You’re taking him away from me.”

Kye moved his hands and cupped my face. His eyes held mine. “Baby Doll, I’m taking him there so you can have your life back. As much as I love seeing you take care of Jag, I can’t expect you to keep doing it. He’s not your responsibility. You want to design clothing. You’ll eventually go finish your degree. But we won’t be out of your life just because we aren’t in the same house. You can’t get rid of me. You’re stuck with me for life. And Jag too. We’re a package.” He smirked when he said the last part.

He still didn’t get it.

“I want him too,” I said in a hoarse whisper. “I can have my dreams and Jagger too.”

He shook his head in disbelief as he smiled. “Damn, Baby Doll. I’m trying to do the right thing by you, and you go and say shit to make it hard. Real fucking hard.”

I wrapped my hands around his wrists as he still held my face. “If you’re taking him back to the other house because of me, please don’t. It will kill me, Kye. I will miss so much. I don’t want to miss his firsts and not be there when he wakes up in the morning. Don’t take him away.”

Kye’s eyes dropped to my mouth for a moment, and I felt my heart rate speed up.

“If we stay with you, I can’t promise that what happened this morning won’t escalate.”

My breathing hitched as he lifted his eyes back to meet mine.

“Okay,” I replied breathlessly.

He tilted his head as he looked at me. “You sure that’s okay?” he asked, his voice a low whisper. “Because when I say escalate, I mean, I’m gonna end up spreading your legs and feasting on your pussy until you are begging me to stop. I’ll fuck you.” He closed his eyes and inhaled sharply, then opened them again. The pale blue color had turned a piercing shade. “Hard and deep and raw. My control with you is slipping. Every day I am with you in that house, it cracks a little more. I can’t stay there with you and not be able to fuck you on the nearest piece of furniture—or hell, against the damn wall. Rip your top off so I can suck on your bouncing tits you tease me with.”

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