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But what was my excuse with E.Z.? I felt happy with him for the first time in days, so I couldn’t blame grief. I had been around him plenty of times before and never wanted to rub myself against him, so I couldn’t understand the almost desperate need I had experienced. That was not like me.
Griffin detached his saddle bag, oblivious to my mini freak out.
“This is the meeting place we specified, so you can rest or stretch your legs or whatever you need. Just stay close. We don’t know how long it will be until Aiden arrives, but it shouldn’t be too long.”
“I would like to help if there’s something for me to do." I didn’t want to rest. I could stretch my legs while helping. "I want to pull my own weight.”
“Can you peel and slice the potatoes?”
“I can figure it out.”
Griffin handed me a knife and filled my arms with potatoes from his bag. I sat on a boulder near the fire, dropping the potatoes on the ground beside me. Knife in hand, I got to work, letting my mind wonder.
When the magic disappeared, and we couldn’t grow any more crops, people would starve. Like Griffin said, sitting here unable to do anything while the world ended sucked. I wished with all my heart that I could do something, anything.
Something poked my hand, and I fumbled the potato, catching it before it hit the ground. As I watched, the potato sprouted an eye. I would have chalked it up to a mistake of the mind or a trick of the eyes— I was clearly losing it after everything— but another eye spurted in the back, pushing into my hand again.
I tossed the potato to the ground and stood, frantically wiping my hands on my tunic.
It looked like an ordinary potato. It didn’t rock on the ground or sprout any more unusual growth. So, whatthe fuckwas that?
Griffin watched me as he secured the horses with long reigns close to the stream. He didn’t comment, instead moving to fill another bucket of water. But I felt his eyes on me when he turned back. Felt the questions in that stare.
I bent to pick up the potato but saw the new eyes again and I couldn’t bring myself to cut them off. I grabbed another from the pile, leaving that one on the ground.
“That one is covered in bugs,” I said in a feeble attempt to explain away more of my abnormal, completely unexplainable behavior around this man.
“Hmm,” he replied, placing two half full pails of water next to the fire. He waved his hand, removing dirt particles from the potatoes I prepared, and scooped some into one of the pails.
“Why didn’t you know E.Z. couldn't use his power during the escape?” Griffin calmly inquired, effortlessly building a stone bridge over the fire with his magic and hanging the pail to boil. He watched the flames engulf the bottom of the pot, acting as if this was a casual conversation. But I knew better. Griff was entirely too perceptive for his own good.
“What..? Umm, I just wasn’t thinking clearly,” I stuttered.
“Hmm,” was Griffin’s response again. He filled that sound with meaning yet said nothing of his thoughts, making me feel bad for humming so much in response to E.Z. earlier.
I couldn’t read Griffin’s ‘hmm' at all. If I thought his words were meaningful, his lack of words almost said more. The less this man said, the more I wanted to hear. It was highly frustrating. Did he suspect something or know I was lying? Ugh, damn watchful man with stupidly complex one-word vocabularies.
Silence passed between us for a few minutes. I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my face. Did this man have the power to stare someone into doing his bidding? Was that the magic he was using on me? Because I was about to scream the secret from the top of my lungs to break the silence and get him to look away. Not that it would work— his eyes always seemed to be on me.
It was distracting and annoying and made my face flush... And my body heat up.
Just when I thought the conversation was over, Griffin spoke. “The fire’s dying. Can you lend it some Air? Get it going again?”
He knew. He had to know. This didn't feel coincidental. I may have questioned my paranoia with another man, but not with Griffin. He knew too much. Those questions, in that order, and honestly that out of the blue, meant he suspected something and apparently would push me to talk about it. The Griffin from last night who’d sat and listened to me and didn’t push me to talk wouldn't have brought this up. But I wasn’t that lucky today.
I could have come up with an excuse. I could have lied again. But I knew he wouldn’t believe any excuse I offered for being unwilling to help stoke the fire. He was entirely too perceptive.
I was scared of the implications of someone else knowing my secret. The kingdom had put citizens down for less. It was unheard of for anyone to have no power at all. Even with the magic disappearing, the weakest user still had something. People would either celebrate my execution or kill me themselves. I could be seen as a heretic or a negative sign of some kind from the Goddess. Or any such superstitions born when citizens are troubled and searching for an explanation for something beyond their understanding and control.
But I was genuinely starting to believe these men had my best interest at heart, and I needed to trust someone. If not them, then who? They saved me and promised to protect me. Maybe they would protect me from this, too.
Plus, I had to tell them eventually anyway. It was as good a time as any.
“I don’t have an element,” I admitted, my head downcast. I sat back on my boulder and laced my hands together.
When all I received in response was another low “hmm,” I continued softly, toeing the dirt.
“No one knows, obviously. Father told me not to tell a soul, and I haven’t.” I kept my eyes downcast, not wanting to see his reaction to this information. “Air was the marker my parents chose. It is strong enough to have status but wouldn’t draw the attention of Fire Users. Plus, he could teach me the signs and such best, being an Air User himself.”
