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Winnie finished dressing, thinking through everything that happened last night. She’d finally been with the man she’d crushed on since high school, fallen in love with in her twenties and finally had in her thirties. She didn’t care what anyone said. He was the man she loved. He might have been ten years older, but he was the only man she could ever see herself with.
Sure, he was grumpy and sometimes snarly, but he was also over-the-top protective, examining every worst-case scenario. She saw that as a trait to admire. He was analytical, which kept their friends and family safe. She adored her gruff Bear. Last night, when Benton had finally given in to every dream she’d ever had, she’d hidden her tears.
Over the years, she’d taken every chance to show him the woman she’d become. Their conversations talking through safety measures for her gym had been the highlight of her days. She’d bugged Regina, the matriarch of the MC, to teach her how to make her cinnamon rolls because they were Bear’s favorite. The added bonus of Bear spending a lot of time with Regina in the kitchen had been taken into consideration, too. Regina had been the positive mother figure Bear had needed when Rascal had taken custody of him. At least, that’s what her sister, Remington, had told her. Being ten years younger than Bear meant she hadn’t experienced Bear’s younger years, but Winnie was an excellent listener, especially when people didn’t know she was there.
Last night had been the first step in their journey to happiness. Feeling Benton inside her for the first time had been everything she’d ever imagined. The first steady push as he seated himself in her had her aching this morning for him again. She’d never had someone pierced inside her before. His piercing had rubbed her in all the right places until she called his name. His deep, dark voice while licking her folds and telling her he couldn’t get enough of her pretty pussy had exceeded everything she’d imagined. When she’d come, she couldn’t help but scream his name. She hadn’t even realized she was going to call him Benton but when they’d been close, it had seemed right. She’d had sex before but with Benton, it was different and not just because of his freaking pubic piercing. It was because he was the man she’d dreamed of, though she was a fan of the piercing.
She wished the lights had been on last night because she’d imagined a hundred different ways to trace his tattoos with her tongue. She loved the tattoos on his arms and she knew he had the Bluff Creek Brotherhood MC logo because he’d gotten it as soon as he got out of the military. He’d added some over the years but most were hidden under his clothes. She’d wanted to see every part of him but she’d worried turning on the light might make him stop. She’d never been happy to hear a thunderstorm until last night. Her first whimper had been involuntary but she might have played it up a little when she heard him suck in his breath then call her name.
She couldn’t see him feeling comfortable coming to her house with her dad’s house being in the line of sight of hers. Maybe he’d be willing to come through the back way to her house or she’d even be willing to come to the clubhouse. She just wanted her man any way she could have him. She’d never been with a man with a beard and thinking about his beard brushing against her nipples then down her torso to her mound had her hoping Bear returned quickly. Maybe they’d have time for one more before they got on the road. Her stomach rumbled. She chuckled. Maybe she’d feed her other hunger first. She was starving.
She hoped Bear was out getting them breakfast. Although she was all about eating nutritionally and keeping in shape, she had a couple of vices. Coffee to get going in the morning was a must have and one of them but she didn’t crave black coffee. Hers had to be flavored with either a French vanilla or caramel flavoring. She limited herself or she’d drink a whole pot by herself. The other was homemade caramels. It had been one of the treats her mom had made before she passed. After her death, Winnie and each of her sisters had picked up making their favorite things their mother made. It had taken her multiple tries, but Winnie had finally mastered homemade caramels. Her first tries were either too soft or hard as little bricks. As much as she and her sisters loved them, she limited how often she made them. They were such a treat Winnie could eat the whole pan in one sitting.
She glanced at the clock wondering how long Bear was going to take. She wanted to talk with him about what was next for them. They’d finally taken the step she’d been longing for. With her being the daughter of an original in the MC, Bear might not want to take their relationship public until he’d had a chance to speak with her dad. Locks loved his daughters and had always told them he wanted them to be happy. Bear made her ecstatic. Her dad’s opinion meant a lot to her, but Winnie wasn’t letting anyone keep her and Bear apart.
They still had an hour and a half to get home. The drive would provide plenty of time for her grumpy man to start sharing his feelings. She didn’t expect his personality to change. She’d fallen in love with the grumpy man who analyzed all possibilities then had plans A through F to keep his family safe.
She couldn’t wait for whatever was next. Marriage and kids were a ways down the road, but Bear would be a fantastic father. He was always helping out with Roam’s kids. Multiple times, she’d found him in the MC clubhouse lying on the floor playing cars with Grant. She’d bide her time and let Bear move them at his own pace. Besides, as many times as he’d had her last night, her aching body needed a break. Her imagination had been sorely lacking because when Bear had stretched out between her legs, holding her thighs apart, she could have sworn it was an out-of-body experience. His full beard had been an added sensation against her thighs and core. She’d lost track of how many times his talented tongue and fingers had made her come. She’d worried she’d almost smothered him when she’d grabbed his hair and forced him closer. His lips had tilted up on the right, which was, for Bear, almost a smile.
The click of the lock had Winnie rushing toward the door. Bear pushed in, juggling coffees and a bag which had an amazing aroma wafting from it. Her man looked good this morning in his jeans and t-shirt tucked in. No MC cut today because none of the guys wore them on security jobs unless specifically requested by the client. She adored Bear in his cut but being able to see his t-shirt tight against his abs was a gift today.
“Here, let me help you,” Winnie offered as she took the drinks, placing them on the small table in front of the room’s window. “I was hoping you were bringing coffee. I need a little pick me up.”
Bear opened the bag, placing a breakfast sandwich and napkin in front of where Winnie had sat along with a fruit cup. He fixed the coffee exactly how she liked and added something healthy to make her happy. He pulled out his sandwich and dropped into the chair. He was quiet, which wasn’t unusual. Bear didn’t fill the silence with empty words but this silence seemed different. Why was every nerve in Winnie’s body screaming danger right now?
“See any storm damage while you were out?”
“Roads are clear. We can get out of here as soon as we’re done eating,” Bear grumbled.
Winnie wasn’t sure what was going on. Bear seemed off from how he normally treated her. He was keeping his head down and refusing to look at her face. They’d been what she would call friends over the years, and they’d taken the next step last night. His demeanor screamed at her things were not what she had expected.
Winnie had always spoken her mind and she wasn’t changing now. If he had an issue, they needed to talk through it.
“Is something wrong?”
Bear finally glanced at her, then down quickly. He’d taken a huge bite of sandwich and she was freaking positive it was so he wouldn’t have to talk yet. As the middle sister of five, she had plenty of experience using silence to unnerve a person until they talked because they were uncomfortable. If Bear had a problem, he’d need to open his mouth because she wasn’t leaving this motel room until he explained why he wasn’t looking at her.
Bear finished chewing, finally looking her in the face. She recognized his look. Regret was in his eyes. Whether he had a pang of guilt because she was Locks’ daughter, or he was remorseful about something else—she wasn’t going to get the happy morning after experience.
“We can’t do this.”
“This?” She motioned back and forth between them.
“Having sex. Being a couple. We didn’t think this through.”
His eyes screamed for her to accept his words at face value but that wasn’t who she was. She’d definitely thought it through. In fact that’s all she’d done over the years.
“I did think this through. I’ve been attracted to you for the last twelve years. I fell in love with you eight years ago. Since you came home four and a half months ago, I’ve taken every opportunity to be around you. Last night wasn’t just sex for me. It was finally having the man I love. I’m happy to slow this down if you need time. I’m always up for getting to know each other better through dates. I could fix dinner and we could watch a movie or just hang out.”
Bear’s eyes resembled a deer when the spotlight caught them—debating if it was flee or freeze time. She’d been around Bear enough to know she might have pushed him too far declaring her love. She was betting on fleeing. She could give him a little space, but it was definitely going to be a quiet ride back to Bluff Creek.
“I’m too old for you and I’m never having kids so we should consider this a lapse in judgment.” Bear wadded up his trash, tossing it in the bin, and grabbed his duffle bag. He motioned with his head for Winnie to grab her stuff.
Hmm. The Bear had spoken and considered the matter closed. She could admit she was hurt. She’d been imagining him walking back in, grabbing her, throwing her on the bed and having his way with her one more time before they left because he couldn’t get enough of her. His response hadn’t been what she’d dreamed but it fit with Bear’s personality. He’d analyzed their relationship and with his thinking couldn’t imagine it succeeding. She’d take a little time to get over how much her heart hurt because she’d wanted him to wrap his arms around her and tell her she could have the fairy tale.
She’d grown up watching the princesses get rescued by the prince. Her sister Remington abhorred the word, but Winnie still liked it with a few changes. Maybe this one had a badass princess who kicked ass beside the prince and liberated him from a life of gray clouds. She could be both. Pretty like a princess but bossy like a queen. Her sisters called her a sunshine personality because she could almost always see the positive. Bear may think him shutting their relationship down was the end but someday, he’d look back and see today was the day the sunshine beckoned him into the light. And the interesting thing about sunlight is everything always looked better when it was bathed in it.
