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Xen winked at me and then brought something up on his phone and pointed to it, showing only Joel.
“That’s the one,” he confirmed with a wink to me. “Let’s get. I’m ‘bout half starved.”
I knew I wasn’t going to get anywhere asking Joel, but Burke came to the house and sat with me on the porch. “Hud took over the grill. I’m gonna smell like smoke for a week.”
“It smells amazing though.”
“Had to up my grilling game. Noah gave me a few marinating recipes for the meat, gave me a couple bottles of the rub he makes for beef. The man has a knack for cooking.”
“So…this secret…who is the guy in the mask?”
Burke chuckled as he stared out into the field. “You know…sometimes things work and sometimes they don’t, Kan. This is one of those times that, well, it could work out great, or it could be rough.”
The most cryptic answer yet. “What does that even mean?”
“It means, my friend, that you’ll have to wait and see. Go on with your life as it is, and maybe something great will come of it. Or, you will never know that it could have been different, so you don’t get hurt. That’s all I can say.”
“You didn’t say anything!”
He finally looked over at me, his eyes shining. “Kan, if I could tell you, and know things would be fine in the end, I would. I don’t want to get your hopes up for nothing if nothing comes of it.”
“So, the guy in the mask, he’s thinking about…me?”
“Yes. The guy in the mask is…exploring things. You’re one of them. Don’t dismiss him for it, though. That would be my first impulse. Some things just hit like a brick, changing your whole life, and it takes time to figure it all out.”
The words were wise I suspected, but there were too many holes in it. “So, he’ll be back tonight?”
“Yes. He will. But…he’ll leave before the…are you still going through with the sex show?”
“I was going to. It’s been a while since I’ve been laid. Why?”
“He won’t watch that. Like you, he’s…not into groups. In fact, he’s just figuring out what he is into now.”
That night I was supposed to do a live sex show with a man from Denver, who was also a porn star. I’d met him, finding his real name was Julio Cortez instead of Dirty Duke, like I’d known him from his videos.
He and his six partners were into sharing, and they’d taken a particular liking to Burke, Damon, and Joel. They traveled to Cowpokes each time it was open, and they all had a blast with each other. I’d seen some a couple nights, and it looked fun. It just wasn’t my thing.
One on one with Dirty Duke, however, I liked the thought of it. The man was a god, perfect body, handsome face, big dick. “Should I not do it?”
“Do it. If you need to get laid, there’s nothing wrong with that. You don’t have a commitment to this guy. He just doesn’t want to see it. That’s all.”
Something bubbled up inside me, a fear that I could be losing something great for a quick fuck on a stage. “Can you maybe get someone to take my place for that?”
Burke smiled knowingly. “I already have Joel as a backup.”
“Joel? He’s so…shy! He’s gonna get on stage?”
“When he’s getting fucked, he ain’t shy a bit. It’ll be a great show. I’ll let your friend know you won’t be doing that show, so he doesn’t have to run so quickly.”
“Thanks…I think.”
Once I was ready to head to the club, there was a crowd of men heading that way, all dressed in leather or skimpy outfits. I watched the parade of them, lusting after every single one.
Yeah, it had been a while for me. It wasn’t like I hadn’t had offers, but first it was the depression and then after…it was the fact that I was vulnerable. I would likely have fallen for the first guy I screwed.
The stages of a breakup. They were rough, and I think I’d gone through them several times over, but I was ready for something else. I wanted to get on with my life, to meet someone and start something new.
It could start that very night if I could figure out who the masked man was. Calling him B didn’t give me a hint. B could stand for anything.
