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“What about you, Zara?” Britney handed her a drink. “First time?”
“Drinking?” She took the glass and grimaced at the burn of the alcohol. “I’ve had wine at dinner.”
She looked so stiff and uptight. It wasn’t her fault. It’s what she was programmed to be.
I didn’t care if she drank. Was wild. Or if she was smart and shy. She should be allowed to be whoever she was. We should’ve been given that freedom. Not molded into the perfect daughters he could show off.
I downed my third drink, trying to chase away my depressing thoughts. “So tell me how you ended up with my dad.”
The glass clicked on the table as I set it down again. Britney crossed her long legs as she turned to face me in the booth. I didn’t understand how a young, pretty, intelligent girl ended up with my jackass father.
“Love can’t be explained.” She smiled brightly at me.
I choked on my next sip of tequila, coughing as it burned a path down my throat. “You love him?”
“Of course.” She sighed dreamily.
“But you know how he is.” I pressed. “The things he used to say to us?”
Zara turned slightly in her seat like she wanted no part of this conversation. I didn’t blame her. She still lived with him.
“He’s different now.” She shifted as her mouth turned down. But I couldn’t stand the idea of my former friend just ignoring how my father had treated me growing up.
She was the one I cried to. The one who consoled me when I had to hide my relationship with Adam. She was the first person, besides him, I told about the pregnancy. She knew about our mother’s death. The beatings our father gave her. But still, she was with him.
“I had to run away so he didn’t kill me after I got pregnant.” I snapped. I grabbed another drink as she gave me those same pity eyes I’d seen in the hospital.
“He wouldn’t have killed you.” She sounded exasperated at my antics, like I was a petulant child holding a pointless grudge. “But it wasn’t like you were innocent. Pregnant at nineteen by a man like him.”
My spine went ramrod straight as I glared at her. “A man like what?”
My fingers tightened on the glass as she stared back. If looks could kill, we would both be dead right now. I had no idea why I felt the need to defend Adam; she was right. He wasn’t a good man. Even if I could ignore the death and destruction, he’d treated me like shit in the end. He’d left me without a word.
“We don’t need to do this,” Zara said, trying to cut through the tension.
Britney’s face morphed as she grabbed Zara and my hand. “She’s right. It’s been years. We should leave it all in the past. Why don’t you tell us who you’ve dated since then?” I finished the drink in my hand as I continued not to say a word. “Come on, Zara doesn’t have anything interesting to say in that department.”
Zara flinched as Britney laughed like she was telling a joke instead of picking at Zara’s wounds. It wasn’t like it was her fault. She’d seen how I’d been ostracized for loving someone. For wanting anything besides an arranged marriage. She was too smart to take the risk. Love wasn’t worth the pain.
I wised up too late.
“I’m not seeing anyone.” I finally answered just so we could move on.
“But there had to be someone in seven years.” Britney insisted as she handed me another drink. They just kept appearing on the table. Perks of being a VIP.
“No.”
I’d tried, but it had always felt wrong. Adam was the only person I’d loved. The only one I’d let see the real me. And still, he’d walked away. I wouldn’t survive that kind of pain again.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Her pity-filled eyes looked blurry to me now. Fake. “It’s been years; you need to move past this.”
Had she always sounded this insincere? Was I really that blind back then to who everyone truly was? Liars who only cared about themselves.
I downed the drink in my hand. I’d already forgotten which number I was on. My legs wobbled as I stood. I grabbed Zara’s hands and pulled her up, too. “Let’s dance.”
To my surprise, she didn’t hesitate. I felt Britney move behind us, but I didn’t care. We made our way to the dance floor, and soon, we were lost in it.
In the crowd. The night.
