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She looks at me, surprise on her face. She clearly wasn’t expecting to hear those words from me. “What for?”
“For dragging you into my family’s mess. For putting your life at risk. For the emotional trauma of witnessing what happened last week.” I tell her. “I’m so sorry.”
“That wasn’t your fault. Your father was sick, there was nothing you could have done.” She says, waving away my apology. “I’ve been wanting to ask how you got my mom here so quickly?”
“They let me call my attorney before I made a statement. I called her instead, I didn’t want you to be alone.”
She considers me for a moment before looking away. “Well, thanks. I had a great week with her.”
“I’m glad to hear that." I tell her. "I missed you.”
She ignores it. “How have you been holding up?”
“Not well.”
“I can imagine. I’m sorry about your parents.”
“I’ve had years to grieve for them. My mom since she disappeared my dad since the first time he hit me.” I tell her honestly. “That’s not why.”
“Why then?”
“Because your smell is gone from my pillow and I can’t sleep.” I say, staring at her unblinkingly. “I want it back. I need it back, actually.”
Anger flashes in her eyes, the first emotion she displays since I walked in.
Good, I think.We’re making progress.
“You should have thought of that before you slept with someone else.”
“I didn’t fuck her.”
She laughs lifelessly. “I don’t believe you.”
“Why would I?”
“Why wouldn’t you?” She retorts.
“Because I love you.”
Something breaks inside her and she turns from me. “Get out.”
“No.”
“Get out!” She says, her voice raw with emotion as she works to hold back tears.
“No. I’m not going anywhere.”
“Fine, then I’ll leave.” She snaps, grabbing her keys, wallet and phone off the counter and heading towards the door. I take two steps to the right, blocking her exit and towering over her.
“Not until you hear me out.” I tell her. I grip her jaw and turn her face towards me, forcing her to meet my gaze. “Whether you believe it or not, I’m madly in love with you Bellamy. I don’t know exactly when it happened – what I know of love is brutal fists and endless pain so I didn’t know how to recognize it when I felt it. It could have been when we spent every afternoon in detention or when you cooked my favorite Lebanese dishes or even as early as the first time we met. That’s absolutely when I became obsessed with you because you haven’t left my mind for a single second since. I wake up thinking of you in the mornings, you’re the first person I want to tell good news to, and the only one I want in my bed at night.”
“I don’t know when I fell in love with you, but what I do know for sure is that my world almost ended when my father pointed a gun at you. I’d rather have died than let him hurt you anymore than he already had.”
“He didn’t hurt me anywhere near as much as you did.” She replies tearfully.
“I’m telling you the truth. I never touched Lyra. When I found out my father killed my mother, I confronted him and he threatened you. He knew how I felt about you before I did and he used it against me. I set that whole thing up at the grand opening so that you’d think I cheated and we’d break up. It tore my heart right out of my chest to hurt you that way and to make you hate me, but I’d rather have you hate me and be safe than continue loving me and be in danger. You’re the person I care about the most in the world, giving you up was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do, but I did it to protect you. In the end, it didn’t even make a difference.”
“You could have told me.”
