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I want to talk to him. Tonight’s the grand opening of the library and I want to know how he’s feeling about it.
The bell rings, signaling the end of class and pulling me out of my reverie. As I exit my classroom, I see Rhys walk out the main doors at the end of the hall.
“Mackley!” I yell, shouldering past a few people to get to him. He doesn’t hear me over the throng, so I yell his name again as I fly through the door and jog down the outside stairs. “Mackley!”
This time, he hears me. He stops where he stands about twenty feet away from me and turns to watch me run towards him, his face impassive.
“Hi.” I say, slightly out of breath.
“Hey.” He says, his tone and face still giving nothing away.
“I, um, I wanted to talk to you.”
“About what?” He asks, his voice devoid of emotion.
I hate this.
This isn’t how I want us to be. I want him to smile at me like he always does, to give me a cheeky grin when he makes a sexual innuendo, or in his case, a very explicit sexual request.
I hate this barrier between us.
There’s a tightness in my chest creating a very strong and stupid urge to go home, get in bed and cry, which I absolutely won’t give in to, but is there nonetheless.
“Practice this afternoon. Are we still on for 4pm? And also, the library opening tonight.” I add, lamely. “I wanted to make sure you were ready.”
His eyes flash with some nameless emotion before they soften marginally. “Yes, practice at four.” He says, “And I am ready, thanks for asking. I think it’s going to be tough but… it’s just a building. I have to remember that.”
The rest of the students filter off to class, leaving Rhys and I standing in the middle of the quad.
“I think they’d be so proud of you for helping to make this happen. For using the money they left you to commemorate them, not just to buy expensive things.”
“Don’t get me wrong, I like expensive things.” He says with a short laugh and my heart lurches at the sound.
This is what I want. It feels like the longer I can keep him talking, the more I can chip away at the ice wall he’s put up between us.
“But you’re right,” He says, the corner of his lips lifting a hair. Another chip in the wall. “They would be proud of me.”
“Well,” I pause, awkwardness freezing my tongue. I’m not sure what the right thing to say is in our circumstance. I want to spend time with him tonight, so I just decide on the truth. “I’d love to spend time with you tonigh–”
My words are cut off as long arms wrap around me from behind me, lifting me off the ground and twirling me around as the person exclaims, “Babe!”
No.
It can’t be.
The arms set me down and release me. I turn and come face to face with Carter.
He really is here.
He’s in Switzerland.
Why was my initial gut reaction to exclaim ‘no’ internally?
He grabs me in a bear hug, pulling me off the ground again.
“Hey, Carter,” I say, returning the hug weakly. “What are you doing here?”
He lets me go and steps back with an annoyed look on his face. “That’s what you have to say to me after I came all the way here just to see you? You realize how much that trip fucking sucks?”
