Page 99 of Carrying Your Lies


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“He has never hurt you!” I defended.

“You don’t know what he’s capable of! You have one side of him – the good side, and I have the ugly side that hurts me. I didn’t mean to cheat, but Henry saw me crying at work one day and was there for me.”

“Liar!” I screamed.

My dad was not abusive. He loved her almost as much as he loved me. He did everything to protect us. Every day, he promised to never let anything come between us.

“I can show you the scars. If you tell him, he will probably kill me.”

Unable to listen to any more slander about him, I walked through the house to get to the garage. She followed me, still pleading to see reason and lie for her.

I’m not a liar like her.

I had almost opened the garage door when she snatched the key and threw it across the room. She grabbed me by my shoulders and shook me. Her eyes were as wide as saucers and filled with panic.

“Don’t do this. Don’t tell him.”

“He deserves to know. You owe him the truth. How can you stay married knowing you betrayed him?”

She let me go. Her lips stopped quivering as a cold look I had never seen on her came about. “He never wanted you. He ordered me to abort you the day we found out we were pregnant. He said you were a mistake.”

My heart clenched at her hurtful words. “You’re lying.”

She backed away from me. “No. It’s the truth. I’m the reason you’re still here. When I refused to listen, he kicked me in the stomach. He said you would ruin us. Maybe he was right.” The single tear streaked down her cheeks.

“He loves me.”

“He loves that he can use you to control me. He swore that he would turn my son against me the day you were born. He promised that you would become my weakness. He threatened to end your life if I ever stepped out of line. Even when you were just a baby.”

My hands balled into fists. “Shut up. You’re lying.”

“When you were a baby, you had colic. You wouldn’t settle unless I cradled you. One night, I didn’t cook dinner. He came home, ran the bath and threatened to drown you all because he was hungry, and it was my fault.”

“Stop it!” My throat tightened as tears threatened to spill over.

“When you were three, he let you run loose in a park. You got lost. It took me twenty minutes to find you. That was my punishment because I couldn’t find his wallet.”

I swallowed hard. My brain conjured up vague false memories of me crying in the park for my parents.

“You’re a liar! He loves me.”

“He doesn’t! He doesn’t know how to love! He hates you and everything you represent. Are you going to choose a man like that over your mother? I love you. He doesn’t. He doesn’t love us. He wanted to get rid of you. He hates that you exist. He tried to kill you so many times! He—“

Silence.

My heart pounded in my ears as my shaky hands dropped the shovel. The loud clang against the cement echoed as I tried to comprehend what I had done.

I dropped to the floor. I watched in a daze as the blood poured from her head. The grey flooring was dirtied by the life seeping out of her. Her lifeless eyes were wide and filled with the fear and surprise she felt in the final moments of her life. Despite her mouth being stuck open, the garage rested in silence with no more lies.

I didn’t move. I sat in the peaceful silence, waiting for the guilt to come.

Time ticked by. I don’t know how long I sat there until I heard his voice.

“Liz? You home? I saw your car on the drive.”

His footsteps faded away as he walked through the house. I hoped he didn’t come into the garage to see that I killed the love of his life.

By then, I knew I would say it was self-defence. In movies, people get away with murder by claiming self-defence.

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