Page 42 of Feels Like Forever


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“Annie?” Rae calls. “Can you open these popsicle sticks? I can’t get it.”

Sucking on my teeth, I crumple up the note. I’ll deal with Wyatt later.

In no time at all, Rae’s having fun building the coaster and I’m having fun helping. The last time we did something this artsy was last year on a Super Fun Saturday. I told her then that we shouldn’t use up all the glitter and fake jewels we bought because, even though we wanted our paper princess crowns to look awesome, we might want to use the leftover stuff another time. Indeed, she’s thrilled to get to use it now. Even though she can’t decorate the coaster until after the glue has dried, she has her plans for it all lined out.

“I’m going to put jewels here and here—” she points at one of the sides without touching it, so as not to bump the freshly-glued sticks, “—and here. And here. Aaaand here, too. And the same thing on the other side. And then I’m going to draw hearts and smiley faces and some stars on the top. And probably a flower.”

“It’s going to be beautiful, dahling,” I say in a fancy accent.

“Yes, dahling,” she copies me. “Very beautiful, dahling.”

We giggle, and then she gives a big sigh. “Okay, hurry up and dry, coaster! And while you dry, I will make the card.”

She spends quite a while on it. I only help after she’s done writing, coloring, and placing stickers, when she’s ready to add some sparkle to the front. I swirl glue around per her instruction and she sprinkles pink and gold glitter on it.

After that, we just laze around. Lunch comes and goes, we take a nap, I do some laundry and make sure Rae doesn’t have any homework that didn’t get done on Friday. To my extreme amusement, I get a text from my boss, who apparently read a local news article about my recent bitchy customer from Monroe’s being arrested for serial identity theft—my intuition about her had been right. Rae is interested in what’s made me laugh so much, so I explain it to her. She thinks it’s funny, too.

When we’re done with dinner, the coaster is dry, so she gets to work on decorating it. We don’t hear from Landon before bedtime draws near, but I’ve already warned Rae that it may be a few days before we can visit his grandma, so she’s not too upset.

She just says, “Aw, man,” when I say it’s time for her bath, because she knows that means it’s almost time to go to sleep.

Once she’s out of the tub and in pajamas, I comb her freshly-washed hair in front of the mirror and ask, “All right, what’s your compliment for the day?”

“Um…I think I did a really good job on the coaster!” She looks at her reflection. “Good job on that, Rae!”

“Oh, yes.” The colorful craft was obviously made by a kid, but it’s pretty and it’s clear that a lot of care went into it. “You did a good job on the card, too. Love the decorations. And the message inside is very sweet.”

She smiles happily. “I should’ve made you one, too!”

I smile back. “Aw. Another time!”

“Yeah! Okay, now give yourself a compliment.”

I tell my reflection that I was a good helper to Rae today, and Rae agrees wholeheartedly. Then we brush our teeth, and then she skips toward her room.

“Baby, don’t walk too loudly,” I say as I follow her. “People live underneath us, remember?”

She freezes just inside her doorway. “Uh oh. Sorry.” She takes care to tiptoe the rest of the way to her bed, and I can tell it’s a struggle. “I’m just so excited to give Landon’s grandma her presents!”

“I know you are!”

“I hope it won’t be too long before we can go.”

As I tuck her in, I say, “I hope that, too.”

And, as it turns out, wedon’thave to wait all that long. Landon calls two nights later as we’re finishing up our dinner and says the nurse at the hospital green-lighted a visit. Rae and I are on our way within minutes, her artwork cradled carefully in her little hands.

I still don’t know what to tell her about the situation, so when we meet Landon outside the entrance he specified, I admit to him that I haven’t explained much. He assures me it’s fine, and then he kneels down in front of Rae.

“Hey, little lady,” he says with a smile. “I’m so happy you made this stuff for my grandma. It looks awesome.”

She hasn’t been nervous about this plan since she first learned about it, but she asks timidly now, “Do you think she’ll like it?”

The wind blows her ponytail into her eyes, and I smooth it away while I attempt to shake my unstyled hair out of my face. After two fruitless tries, I give up, annoyed.

Landon’s ruffled hair only makes him look more handsome than usual. He nods in response to Rae’s question and tells her, “I do think she’ll like it.”

He pauses to inhale slowly. After holding the breath for a few seconds, he releases it and speaks more softly.

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