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On second thought, maybe calling them all here was a mistake, but it’s not like I counted on Titus still beingalive. Octavia stops short when she sees Titus and is actually speechless. When she recovers, she starts in on him immediately.
“You spineless, worthless weasel of a man. I mourned you. I should have known you would fake your death! Posey was never good enough to take you out. You’re like a fucking whack-a-mole, just popping up somewhere else after we thought you were gone.”
I notice Lairus is burning brighter, and it’s almost uncomfortably bright in the room. Esmaray is pointedly not looking at her ex, while Titus and Octavia start to trade verbal blows. At this point, I’m not sure if they’re going to fuck or kill someone.
“Enough!” I shout, trying to get everyone to focus on why I called them here instead of their stupid Real Housewives of Solarembullshit.
Attention turns to me, but before I can make the same demand I’ve been making for what seems like the last two hours, a pain sizes my stomach. I drop the blade, doubling over to hold onto myself. Everyone in the room has already given up on Essos, which feels like they’ve given up on me too. We are the same heart. We’ve spent thousands of years together. I no longer know where he ends and I begin. Without him, I don’t know if I can do this.
I fall to my knees as the wind is knocked out of me. I can only see people’s feet as everyone crowds in to touch me.
“Don’t touch me.” I struggle to stand up, waiting for the feeling to pass or see if there is something else. Is the adrenaline just leaving my system? “Help Es—”
This time I cry out when I feel the pain. I want to let my whole body fold in on itself, but I can’t. I need them to help Essos.
Callie squats in front of me, gently placing her hands on my shoulders.
“Hi, sweetie. You need to let me look at you and check on Pom. Ipromisewe will take care of Essos, but you know he’s going to be upset if you’re suffering, and it sounds like you are.” Her full lips pull into a tight smile as she tries to convince me that this is what I should do. Her kind brown eyes are full of concern as she waits for me to do something, anything. I give a small nod.
Callie glances over my shoulder at someone, nodding so whoever it is can see, and I’m scooped up again. It’s getting old, being manhandled, but I wrap my arms around Tink’s neck, wanting to cry from the pain. He starts to take me out of the room.
“No!” I shriek and start to struggle. I need to be here. I need to see color return to Essos’s face. I need to see him smile and take a full breath. There is no reason I can’t be taken care of here.
“Put her here,” Xavier says from out of my sight. Tink changes direction to another sofa. He sets me down and Callie and Xavier start to check me over. They talk through my injuries, and it’s Callie who asks about the fight with Posey because Xavier can’t bring himself to say her name, though he tries. When I mention the blow to my back, they share a look. I’m tired of all these silent conversations going on.
I have to double-tap the armor that Tink gave me so Callie can place her hands on my stomach. She’s silent and I hold my breath, waiting for her to say something or do something. I want to reach out and feel for Pom to see if she’s moving around in there. I look up at Xavier with tears in my eyes.
“I want Cat,” I plead, needing my friend now more than ever.
Tink slides his hand into mine, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’ll get her,” he promises and then he’s gone.
Xavier takes my hand, and I can feel it warming. That warmth spreads through my body, focusing on my knee, which is slowly healing while I wait for Callie to say something.
“Pom’s okay. I think she’s just feeling your stress. I’m not a mortal doctor, and I’m going to get the midwife to come and look at you, but I can feel her heartbeat and it’s strong. You need to rest. Let us worry about Essos.”
“No,” I say through gritted teeth. “You’re not making me go anywhere. I’m seeing this through.” I look past Callie to the four awkward Titans who look like teenagers squabbling over who kissed whose boyfriend.
“Are you four just going to stand there or are you going to actually do something useful?” Helene snaps. I’m grateful to her for taking charge. She could be by my side, holding my hand, but she’s doing what I need, making sure I still have a husband when this day from hell ends.
Esmaray scoops to pick up the blade I dropped. My whole body tenses as she moves to where Essos lies shirtless and too still. Callie actually growls at me until I let myself relax. Xavier is still infusing me with warmth, while Callie stitches the wound on my chest, the one made with the same blade that might take Essos from me.
It is Esmaray who slides through the bindings of his stitches, reopening the wound. Essos writhes, groaning in pain. When I move to try to be by his side, Xavier and Callie both hold me down. I’m left powerless as I watch the woman who purports to be my mother slice her hand, letting herself bleed freely into Essos’s wound. She hands off the blade to Lairus, who compiles without comment.
“Shouldn’t that be enough?” Octavia asks, looking down at Essos’s wound.
Helene gapes at her mother. “I cannot believe you two monsters actually raised me. That is your son, yourchild. He is dying and needs your help. It’s time to put on your big girl panties do something good for once.” Helene scolds her parents the way one would scold an insolent child.
Always needing to one-up Octavia, Titus takes the blade and in one brutal action cuts his palm before taking Octavia’s hand and cutting hers as well. They squeeze their hands over Essos, letting the blood drop together.
Esmaray walks over to me, blocking my view, and I want to scream at her to move, but her uncut hand smooths over my cheek. She brushes a gentle kiss to my brow.
“Call anytime you need something, even if it’s something like babysitting. The Fates have amazing things planned for your girl.”
She runs her soothing fingers over my forehead, back and forth. It’s rhythmic and surprisingly helps to calm me. I wonder for a moment if she did this when I was a child. It’s the last thought I have before I drift into oblivion.
CHAPTER38
My focus hasn’t left Essos’s sleeping form since I woke up. He’s still paler than I would like, but I can watch his bare chest rise and fall as I lie beside him. Cat, my rock, is lying on my other side, snoring softly. As badly as I want to get up to pee, I won’t disturb her.
