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“Have you even taken a look around since you’ve gotten here? Have you gotten a real look at our people? Have you seen their fear? Their anxiety? Their hopelessness? Or you are too busy in the garments of your mate?”
I charge at him and bring my hands down on the table and the hard wood smashes under the force of my hand. I am on him the next moment and my hands are around his neck as I shove him on the wall. He makes no moves to stop me.
“What have you done?! At least I was gone, but what have you done except sit on your rear and make dolls!” I growl.
The door swings open but I can barely hear anything as I pant, trying to reel in the red that is in my vision. Hands grab onto me, and they yank me away from him, but my eyes don’t leave my uncle.
What am I doing?
“They await you.” He says before he bends down and picks up the ghoul and his knife and sits down, resuming what he was doing like I am not there.
“Never attempt that again, Igor. You will face the appropriate penalty.” He dismisses me with those words.
I send the guards flying before I leave the office. I can’t think or see anything as I descend the stairs. My cousin barely registers behind me as I stomp to the gate.
The sun is setting the next day and we elect to dismount thekarajisand rest. It is an area with a small pond and caves so we can rest for the night. We light a fire in the cool air and sit for dinner.
In my company it was me, Zod, Kaja, and 3 others. I volunteered so I can check on Aria while the others reported back to my uncle. It settles me a little that she is settling well. At least that’s one less thing to fret about.
The others talk about this and that, and I don’t fail to notice the distance from those who were once close comrades. I hadn’t really taken it to heart before but now I am noticing more and more. When they finish and they take to their resting corners, me and Zod are left.
Long silence settles between me and my cousin.
“I planned to come and get you, but you were already free when I returned.” He starts. “I wasn’t going to leave you.”
His words catch me with surprise. I had planned to ask him.
“It wasn’t your job to get me out of a mess I got myself in, cousin.” I state. In truth, I do not blame my cousin. Yes, I would have appreciated help, but it was my fault I put my family in danger.
“We are kin still, Imp.” He says.
Zod and I have always had a relationship based on mutual respect. Because we are both hot heads and we like carving our own paths, we mostly stayed out of each other’s way, but there has never been bad blood. And he always was beside me when I needed him. He even followed me in my quest for revenge on Hettar’s uncle.
But after everything, so much brings me feelings of shame. And on top of everything I don’t know how to bridge the gap between me and the people I once loved. Every time I try to do something I think is good, it is the wrong action. Before it was for selfish reasons and arrogance, but how am I still wrong trying to do right by my family?
After a long silence, I let out a long exhale. “I feel like everything I am doing is wrong, Zod.”
He takes my gaze fully, not rushing to answer. “Caught between your mate and the tribe?”
“I am notImpanymore,” I state.
“That is as clear as daylight.” He answers with a small smile.
“Do they want the raging maniac back? I don’t understand. I thought I came back a better orc. Isn’t that what everyone wanted?”
“Orcs don’t know what they want, cousin. That’s why they have leaders to tell them what they want.” He says
“Explain.”
“After you left, everyone thought you were our problem, and everything would be dally after. The truce with the Bono wasn’t as easy as everyone thought it would be. Another war ensued 5 years after you left. Bonos had not forgiven, and you were proven correct in not trusting them when plans were found aimed at destroying the mountain and killing all of us inside after the truce. But when the Sokos came, everything changed. The leaders were out of their depth, and they went back to the negotiating table for a new truce. Famine came after. I think many thought you would come with solutions and give them the hope and strength they need. Hope to finally end this thing with the Soko so life can move forward.”
“I worry about my family’s safety, Zod.” I state honestly.
“I know, cousin.” He pauses. “For what it’s worth, you are a much better orc then you were before. I didn’t see it then but maybe sending you away was the right choice. And you have my support no matter what you do. As always.”
Then something else comes to my mind. “Why did you choose to not succeed your father? You, Hergo, or one of the others would have been better fits. Todo is a child.”
“We all know our place, cousin, and we know yours. The confusion and fear of the tribe has never been our reality. We know the rightful King,” he says simply, even though his words are heavy.
