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She nodded, and kept nodding, and he figured he knew what was running through her mind, same as his. “They’re fine, everything’s fine, please God let everything be fine.”
Knowing Jenna, she probably had a more creative mantra going on. He remembered the time Zack got a high fever, when he was four. She’d spent her time at his bedside making a mental list of all the wonderful qualities she saw in her son. She’d turned it into a mantra with the idea that imagining all the good he could do would help bring him back into the world.
Maybe it had worked, because his fever came down and he was back to his vibrant self in a matter of days.
Billy had been on a road trip at the time, which left him with nothing but FaceTime during the entire crisis. This time, he’d be here every step of the way. So at least there was that.
“Should we talk about last night?” Jenna said abruptly as the plane descended toward the runway.
He jumped. So she did remember; he’d been starting to wonder if she did.
“Do you think we need to? Don’t worry, I know it doesn’t change anything between us.”
Her expression went blank for a moment, as if she was disappearing inside herself. Had he said the wrong thing? But wasn’t that what she wanted, for things to continue as they were?
“We didn’t even kiss. Do you think that’s strange?”
He thought about it for a moment as the plane descended toward the tiny airport. “I guess it didn’t seem strange at the time. We just went with the flow.”
“And the flow didn’t include kissing for a reason. A good reason.”
He braced himself; this ought to be good. “What’s the reason?”
“Kissing is too intimate. Everything we did, it was all on the surface. Did you notice that?”
She was right. There’d been no penetration of any sort, not even a tongue kiss.
“I did notice, now that you mention it. I imagined those orange cones that control traffic. It just felt like…” He shrugged. “Like certain things were off limits.”
“Exactly.”
His stomach cratered. He got was she was saying. She was making the point that what they had done last night didn’t bring them any closer together. Not where it counted. Not inside.
The plane hit the runway, bouncing up and down a few times. Jenna grabbed for his hand again, the gesture so automatic that he grinned to himself.
Jenna might tell herself that last night didn’t change anything. But his gut told him different. A month ago, she wouldn’t have grabbed for his hand like that. She would have gone for the armrest, which was right there under her arm. But no, she’d reached all the way across the aisle to hold his hand.
How could he make her see that things had changed? He wasn’t exactly sure, but she’d just given him a major clue. Of the many things they hadn’t done last night, she’d focussed on one. Kissing. He could work with that.
Eighteen
At least that was settled. Jenna didn’t want any awkwardness or open questions hanging over them while they dealt with this next crisis. Thank God she and Billy were on the same page. Nothing that they’d done last night meant anything. Now she could relax and focus on the important thing. The kids.
Billy took the wheel while she monitored her phone for texts and information. As they drove down the freshly plowed highway toward Lake Bittersweet, snow drifts loomed on either side of the road. It felt like driving through a tunnel of snow. Icy ruts trapped their tires as if trying to tug the Tundra off course.
She still hadn’t gotten any communication from Annika at all. She’d even called the clinic, but they said she hadn’t come in, even though they were swamped and could have used her help.
Galen had finally dug his way out of his house and was snowshoeing over to hers. It might take a normal human an hour to get there, but Galen was a wilderness expert and estimated it would take him half that time. He promised to text the second he got there.
She scanned through the weather reports. “It’s a historic snowstorm,” she told Billy. “The biggest December snow dump since they’ve been keeping records.”
“Wow. Why didn’t we get any damn warning about it?”
“Apparently it was supposed to pass on by, but it got stalled out and just kept dumping on us. I’m translating from forecaster lingo,” she explained. “I’ll bet you anything it’s a climate change thing. Everything’s getting more extreme than it used to be.”
“Here we go,” he murmured.
“Excuse me? What does that mean?”
