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Claire: Has this got something to do with that hot man next door!? Also, goooood morning!
Me: Hi! And yes! Are you guys free for lunch and some cocktails?
Samantha: Let's go to that cute bistro on Tyrade Street? I'm craving their basil pesto!
Claire: You crave the weirdest things. But they do make a great Mimosa, so I am happy with that.
Me: 12:30?
Samantha: See you there!
I stretch my legs up enjoying the lazy start to the weekend. Flashes of what happened in the pool played through my mind. I pick up my pillow and cover my face. "What are you doing Gianna?" I say out loud into the soft fabric.
Okay, no point in laying here all morning wallowing in my confusion. I should go for a run before I meet up with the girls.
I am relieved and disappointed not to bump into Hudson on my run around the estate. It is better though; I know because I don't understand what exactly is going on with me. I cannot stop thinking about him. Not only how insanely fucking hot he is and how incredible he felt against my body, but him --- just everything about him. The more I think about him the more fear I feel. It has been so long since I've let myself feel anything and now, I am playing with fire. My ex's brother. Why does he have to be his brother?
I climb into the shower hoping the steam will ease my tension. Along with the dirty thoughts that are playing over and over in my mind.
* * *
We are seated near the window, overlooking the busy street. The restaurant is full of energy and color, and I feel myself relaxing into the vibe. The waiter places the cocktails on the table and Claire and Samantha can barely even wait for him to walk away before they start drilling me for information.
"Hang on. I will tell you everything! It's just all happening so fast; it is maybe a little hard to explain everything." I take a drink and a deep breath.
"Oh, just get to the point. Did you kick him in the balls or kiss him?" Claire is not one to beat around the bush.
"Actually, the kissing happened a while ago. Last night it got a lot further than that --- in the pool." I sip my drink while they process what I have just spilled.
"The pool?" Samantha, being the bolder one of us all raises her glass. "Girl, I never knew you had it in you."
"Not so loud. I don't need the whole restaurant to know." I blush.
Claire just looks puzzled. "What do you mean the kissing happened a while ago? Why did we not know all of this was going on?" I feel guilty for keeping secrets, even if it wasn't intentional.
"I guess I was in denial myself." I was trying to sort out the inner conflict for the inner horniness.
"Okay, well, now you have to tell us everything." Both of them stare at me expectantly.
I take a breath, then a long sip of my mimosa. "Fine. It started after I suggested to him that we should be friends, you know, like we planned." This is Samantha's fault now I think about it.
"Friends with benefits is not what we planned." Samantha chirps.
"Just be quiet and listen OK. This was your bright idea." She nods and pretends to zip her mouth closed and throw away the key. I laugh.
"Okay, so the first time we kissed, well --- I stopped him. And the second time we kissed, he stopped me. But then last night neither of us stopped each other because I think we just got to that point." I pause for another sip of courage, "The main thing though is that --- I think I have feelings."
"Are you serious?" Claire looks concerned. "I mean is that a good decision, Gi?" I don't usually catch feelings.
"Hello, why do you think I called an urgent meeting with you guys." I need them to talk sense into me, and quickly before I completely lose my mind and fall in love with Hudson.
I do my best to explain everything to them. While I am talking and actually putting it all into words, I realize the depth of what is going on inside my head and my heart. I tell them about how I see him as a father, how gentle he is with Taylor, and how he is vulnerable when we speak about what he is going through with the custody battle. I realize I have been allowed to see a side of him that no one else ever got to see and that side of him is so special. His whole serious, grumpy, closed-off outward appearance isn't the real him at all.
When I finally stop talking Samantha says. "Oh gosh, you have it bad, Gi."
I realize she is right.
"I guess I do. Now what do I do about it?" I have no idea what I should do now, run? Hide? Day drink?
