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“Paris, I love this so much. Thank you!”
I’d gotten a package of diapers in every size, swim diapers, and training pants along with a gift certificate to a day at the spa for Bristol to use after the baby was born. “You’re welcome.” I hoped the smile I flashed her was convincing enough for her to believe I wasn’t about to fall apart.
The shower was beautiful, and before I lost my clients and had to shut down my business, I got this small venue reserved for Bristol and organized the decorating and catering. It was out of my wheelhouse but relatively easy to do. It was also the last event of any kind that I would plan.
But that wasn’t why I wanted to escape.
It was the looks I’d gotten from almost every woman here. Most of which I already knew from Warrenville, and the rest either visiting family or co-workers of Beck’s from the town over in Lawless.
I couldn’t escape the gossip train that circled on a continuous loop, and being under all of this scrutiny affirmed why I stayed locked away in my apartment.
Bristol was too occupied to notice, and I was glad. She didn’t need to get upset on my behalf. I stayed in my seat, my eyes facing forward the entire time, and pretended to be as into the cute baby things as everyone else.
Once the gifts were all opened, I scurried down the hall to the bathroom and was just about to flush when I heard the door open. “Do you know who that blond is?” a woman asked.
“Yeah. I’m so glad Lilly fired her from planning her wedding. And after knowing what she did, I can’t believe Bristol still had her plan this.”
“I know. It baffles me that Bristol still thinks she won’t stab her in the back. Paris Donovan can charm a priest out of his pants. I’d never trust her around my man.”
The sink water turned on and drowned out some of their laughter. “I feel sorry for all the women whose husbands worked at Donovan Corp. I heard that she was trying to take over her father’s company and was caught fucking the VP to blackmail him. That’s why she got fired.”
“I heard that too, and something else about her being pregnant and not knowing if it was the VP or janitor’s baby.”
My knees wobbled, but it didn’t matter because the rest of me was suspended in the reality I was in.
“Wouldn’t surprise me, she’s such trash.” The water shut off. “Remember when she said she was pregnant and didn’t know which Ryder brother was the father?”
“Once a whore, always a whore.” They both cackled, and even though their screeches faded away until I was left in silence, their ridicule echoed in my head.
I stared at the floor-to-ceiling stall door, the slats becoming blurry as tears filled my eyes. The shower was almost over, and I needed to get the room back in order before I went home. Once I was there, I was never leaving again.
I fanned my face and made sure my eyes weren’t red, then returned and made myself as invisible as I could while I began clearing tables. I didn’t know who was gossiping in the bathroom, but I could feel their judgmental glares like lasers on the back of my head.
If I knew who was talking shit and I’d been a bitch to them in the past or something, it would make more sense. But I didn’t recognize their voices, which meant they were random strangers spreading rumors about things that were so far from the truth that it was almost funny.
No matter how much I used to pretend I didn’t care what anyone thought of me, I did. I just got really good at faking otherwise. I became an expert at hurting them before they could hurt me.
I knew people didn’t like me, and some of it was justifiable. I’d made a lot of mistakes in the past and those I hurt deserved to be angry with me. I didn’t sleep with the VP or the janitor, and I wasn’t trying to take over the company, so who was saying I did?
My father? Mother? Catty bitches from the office who thought I was a slut and looked down on me for what I was forced to do? For what they had no clue I endured?
The amount of disappointment I’ve had in my life was almost too much to bear, and as much as I hoped things would have been different, I should have known better. If I’d been realistic, I never should have invested in a business so close to home with my history. Or better yet, I should have been smart enough to realize that anything that wasn’t a direct order from my father would be sabotaged. If not by him, then by one of his cronies.
Whatever.
I had my cats and a source of income that I hated doing the work to get, but I was better off subjecting myself to that than to women who treated me exactly like the reason they shamed me.
“Hey.” Bristol stopped me between tables. “Everything was perfect, thank you so much.”
“I’m glad you liked it.”
“It was more than I could have ever asked for and…” Her joyous demeanor flattened, and she scrunched her eyebrows together. “Are you okay?”
I glanced over my shoulder and saw Beck walking in, thank God. “I’m fine. Go home, you’ve gotta be exhausted.”
“Something’s wrong.”
“It’s not.”
