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“I don’t want to talk about that yet,” I said, and thankfully, he didn’t push the issue.
He bent his head, kissing me softly. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. Just know that I’m here for you. And I will be, every step of the way, as you navigate this.”
I wasn’t sure what that meant, what it entailed, and I had a feeling if I did, I might collapse on the floor and never make it out of this room. So, I shoved my feelings down deep, even knowing I’d have to pull all the garbage out again and sort through it at some point. I just…I couldn’t handle that right now.
I focused instead on the strength of the man I loved, trusting we’d find our way through this too.
When we reached the kitchen, Abi spun around from where she’d been busying herself with baking. A pan of homemade cinnamon rolls sat on the counter, and it smelled like another was still in the oven.
“Mariah, you’re awake!” she exclaimed, dropping what she was doing and rushing to me with a smile on her face. But despite her joy at seeing me, I didn’t miss the hint of grief in her blue eyes.
“Oh, Abi,” I said, rushing forward and wrapping my arms around her. I’d been through hell and back, but Abi had lost her mate. Fury, pain, and the need for retribution for what Tomas had done eclipsed my own suffering as I held Abi, my heart breaking for her. She clung to me like a lifeline, a sob escaping her. “Sebastian didn't deserve this.”
“None of us did,” she said, then she pulled back, dashing away her tears and shaking them off as best she could. It was admirable. Impressive, even. But I knew exactly what she was doing, tucking all those emotions away. I was doing the very same.
Abi cupped my face in her hands. “But I'm so, so glad you're okay, Mariah. I don't think my heart could have taken it if we'd lost you, too.”
“Thank you, Abi,” I whispered, touched by her comforting words, even in her own pain. I glanced back at Evan, forgetting about the cinnamon rolls when an even more pressing thought struck. “Where is Sofia? I need to see her.”
Evan’s eyes softened. “She’s in her new room. Abi’s been working on it for her.”
“New room?” I said, puzzled. Her old room was right across the hall from us. I’d heard her earlier, loud and clear. “What are you talking about?”
“Come on, let me show you.” He took my hand and led me back up to the second floor, only this time instead of stopping at the first set of doors, he led me farther down the hallway. “Abi hasn’t stopped moving since we got back to the clan lands. It seems like the only way she can keep from having a complete breakdown is to stay busy. So she took on a new project.”
We stopped in front of a closed door, two doors down from our own, and Evan opened it, revealing a beautifully decorated nursery. The walls were painted a soft lavender, and there were delicate dragon decals scattered throughout. A plush area rug covered the floor, and a cozy reading nook was tucked into one corner. The crib, adorned with pastel linens, sat against the far wall, and a changing table stood nearby, stocked with diapers and baby supplies. The new room Abi had designed for Sofia was beautiful. A perfect home for our little girl.
My breath caught in my throat as I took in the thoughtfully decorated space. “Abi did an amazing job.”
“She did,” Evan said. “I told her we could wait but she insisted. She said with our moving in permanently, Sofia needed a permanent room, too—one big enough to run around in once she’s mastered crawling.” He chuckled, then he stared at me wide-eyed, realizing what he’d said.
He took my hands in his. “A lot has happened while you were out, Mariah. A lot of things we need to talk about. I’m selling the penthouse. I can’t go back there again.”
His eyes looked haunted, and I wondered just what he’d gone through in the past week with my life hanging in the balance. Anguish soared through me, taking my breath away, and it took me a minute to realize it was an echo of his own pain, a hint of what he’d experienced. No wonder he never wanted to go back.
“That’s okay, Evan. We don’t have to.”
He held my hands, drawing me closer. “I know you didn’t agree to any of this. I didn’t want to make any decisions without you, but there were some things I couldn’t wait for. Some choices that had to be made.”
“Like you becoming alpha?” I said softly. That part of the night in the lab was a memory that both shattered me, and one I’d never forget. Sebastian passing on the mantle. Evan becoming his true heir.
He nodded, swallowing hard. “I wanted to wait for you, but the clan needed me to step up. You didn’t ask for this, and I understand if you’re upset.”
I hushed him with a gentle kiss, going up on tiptoes and twining my fingers around his neck, unable to bear the guilt clouding his eyes.
“You stepped up because your people needed you, Evan,” I said when I broke the kiss. “I could never fault you for that, and as for living here, I’ve learned a lot about what home means this past month. That place is with you and Sofia, no matter where that is.”
He exhaled slowly, relief flickering across his handsome features as he held me to his chest. “Thank you.”
As we stood there, entwined in each other’s arms, another pressing question came to the forefront of my mind. “What about Jax? Is he here?”
Evan hesitated before answering. “I don’t know his condition the last time you saw him, but Jax showed up on our doorstep, worse than I’d ever seen him. It’s how we found out where you were.”
My pulse jumped. “Is he okay?”
“He came back to the clan lands with us, and our medic has been looking over him, but he up and disappeared right after Sebastian’s…right after we…” He took a minute to compose himself. “Jax was consumed with guilt for what happened. Said he should have seen it coming and protected you better from Tomas. I guess I can understand why, but I told him countless times that it wasn’t his fault. I found a letter from him after the ceremony saying he was going to lie low for a while and that he’d be in touch. I haven’t seen him since.”
My heart ached for Jax getting tangled up in this mess. I hoped he’d find the peace he so desperately needed, but something told me it wouldn’t come easily. Tomas was still out there, the threat far from over.
