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As the four of them argued between themselves, loneliness fell over me like a heavy, chilly fog. They were so consumed by their own bitterness and darkness that they seemed to have forgotten about me entirely.
And they would hurt me in order to win. I’d thought Sebastian was my hero, carrying me out of the fire, rescuing me from my nightmare…but he was the one who had started it all.
I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to ward off the cold emptiness that had settled in my chest. Usually, one of the guys would’ve noticed and moved to wrap me up in their warmth, but right now they were too busy with their fight.
They wanted to help me, but they were all cocky alpha types who had a hard time letting anyone else in. I wondered what it had looked like in our past. The five of us had all loved each other then, hadn’t we?
And as much as I loved them, I couldn't shake the feeling that I needed to find the answers to my past on my own.
Because I couldn’t really trust any of them.
Fury shot through me.
I couldn’t be stupid. Someone had attacked me once and would again, and these guys did have the ability to protect me.
But my only option was to go further back in my past and unlock my memories myself. I couldn’t count on them to help me connect with my past. They’d kept so much from me. I needed to find answers, to understand who I really was before all of this mess began.
I needed to go back to the house where I grew up.
“Excuse me,” I murmured.
Let them think I was making my way to the bathroom. Carter and Greyson were straining toward each other as if they were about to come to blows. Carter was still pissed, I knew, about how Greyson had purposely activated an old injury. The concussion and ruined date weren’t helping either.
Maybe it was impossible to ever bring these four men back together.
My heart raced as I made my way across the lobby. They would notice I’d stepped away soon, but it stung that they even let me get this far. As soon as I stepped outside and let the door close behind me, the silence enveloped me like a blanket. The city was quiet outside, the moonlight diffused by the clouds and the soft rain falling across the empty street.
I had to be careful. Someone wanted to use me to hurt them. I wasn’t going to do anything stupid.
I pulled out my cell phone and texted Carrie.I need help…
Carrie and I could figure out a way for me to get back to my old house without putting myself in needless danger…or her. There was no way I was letting Carrie get mixed up with whatever was happening. But Keith, as big of a dork as he was in some ways, had a background in the Special Forces, and he had friends who could help.
I wasn’t going to run away from these guys without a plan. But God, did I ever need a break from them all.
And I had memories from before I met Carter, Sebastian, Jack, and Greyson. And just like these men helped me unlock some of my memories…if I ever wanted to remember my mother’s face, I needed to go back.
I stepped out onto the sidewalk, into the cold.
Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, headlights gleamed brightly. A car raced toward me. It shouldn’t matter, I was on the sidewalk. But old fear still gripped my chest.
I tried to take a step backward, but I couldn’t move.
The memory gripped me like a vice, pulling me back into the past. I was once again standing on a different street, my heart pounding as I watched a car barrel toward me. That night had been dark and stormy, rain blurring the headlights. I’d thought that I was seeing things wrong. Sebastian’s urgent voice echoed… through the past? The present? I didn’t know where I was anymore.
I’d turned and run, and I ran now. My breathing was loud in the night air, rain splattering across my face. It was instinctual panic that made no sense.
I glanced over my shoulder as I careened wildly for the building, trying to get someplace the car couldn’t leap the curb and hit me.
Time seemed to slow down as the engine revved.
The car jumped the curb. It was mere feet away from me, its headlights casting an eerie glow across the rain-soaked pavement.
Realization hit me like a punch to the gut.
This time I’m going to die.
A one, two punch.
