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“I just talked with Parker,” Tilly went on, speaking of Parker Freeman, the editor of theEmerald Creek Gazette, “and he thinks the bigger newspapers in San Antonio will post the picture, too, so he’s going to write a story to go along with it.”
Great. Just great.
“Parker thinks the timing is perfect for a story like that to really take off,” Tilly went on, still gushing. “It’ll not only be a chance for him to mention Jack’s life celebration, but it’ll showcase you as our very own local hero.”
Something inside Egan snapped. Just snapped. And he heard the words tumble out of his mouth before he could even think about stopping them.
“I’m not a hero,” he snarled. “Jack is dead because of me.”
Tilly shook her head. “What do you mean? He was on orders in Kandahar.”
This was not going to be easy, but that didn’t stop him. “Jack was in Kandahar, but he wasn’t on a mission at that particular moment. He was in that vehicle because I asked him to come and see me. If I hadn’t done that, he wouldn’t have been anywhere near that IED, and you wouldn’t be having a life celebration for him. You’d have your son.”
Tilly stared at him and stared as Egan watched her take in the words, one by one. The words and their god-awful meaning.
“Oh,” she muttered. Justoh. And she pressed her hand to her trembling mouth.
Tears instantly filled her eyes, and she looked at him, not with hero worship but the truth. The cold, hard, horrible truth that had haunted Egan for three years would now haunt Jack’s mother as well.
What the hell had he done?
It was too late to take everything back. Egan knew he was going to regret this moment for the rest of his life. He could add it to the regret he already felt because of what he’d done to Jack.
Tilly didn’t even try to wipe away the tears, but she did back away from him when he reached out in a gesture to steady her. She backed away, and as if looking at the face of a monster, she turned and ran.
Before she even made it to her car, Egan could hear the woman’s sobs.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
ALANATRIEDTOsoften her scowl even though it seemed to be her go-to response when a virtual date popped up on her phone screen. Thatgo-toshould have been her Texas-sized clue to put an end to this particular social activity, but she answered the FaceTime call, anyway, hoping that the next few minutes weren’t a complete waste of time and data usage.
“Hi,” the man greeted, and while he was smiling, sort of, anyway, there was a definite hesitant edge to it. Maybe he had also been asked about the size of one of his body parts. “I’m Dave,” he added, and judging from the way it just rolled off his tongue, that was probably his real name.
“Alana,” she said.
Unlike Lucky, Dave’s call was right on time, and he didn’t look like a teenager. In fact, he looked exactly the age he’d listed, thirty-five, and his profile picture was as close of a likeness as a photo could get.
“So, you’re a dietitian,” he said. “Do you enjoy your job?”
“Most days.” She had to look down at the brief bio beneath his picture to see what his occupation was. A fireman, and judging from what she could see of the background, it appeared he was actually at the fire station. “How about you? Do you enjoy your job?”
“Most days,” he echoed, but he flashed a smile to go along with it. “We could probably use the services of a dietitian around here.” He leaned in as if telling a secret. “There are three casseroles with the wordsurprisein the fridge right now and at least three kilos of cheap chocolate on the counter.”
She smiled, too, but Alana knew hers wasn’t anywhere near as bright as his. She continued to glance through his bio and saw no red flags, no weirdo stuff.
And that only deepened her scowl.
She’d thought if she ever had a virtual date with a guy like this, that it would spark her interest in having a relationship. Oh, she had a spark all right, but it wasn’t anything Dave the fireman, or any other virtual date could give her.
Crap.
Her spark seemed to be only for Egan, and while she listened to Dave continue to make jokes about fire station food, her mood only got worse.
“Uh, is everything okay?” Dave asked. “I’m babbling too much, I know. Nerves,” he added with a chuckle. “I mean, I saw your face on the screen, and I thought, oh, wow, she looks great. Amazing, actually, and I really need to impress her.”
“You’re impressive,” she said, cutting him off. “In fact, on a scale of one to ten for virtual dates, you’re a ten.”
But he wasn’t Egan. She didn’t spell that out, but she wanted to tell him not to waste his time, that this wasn’t going anywhere.
