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What I wouldn’t give to go back and undo the mistakes of my past. The thought is unwelcome. The past has happened and you can’t hide from it. The only thing you can do is embrace it and keep moving forward.
Right now, my moving forward looks a lot like dropping Savannah off at the nearest hotel.
TEN
Savannah
The evening after my shopping trip with Sutton, I walk in the door at six. Immediately, my eyes connect with Noah from his position perched on one of the uncomfortable stools at the kitchen island. Neither of us breathe a word.
My skin prickles as I feel his gaze track me, as I dump my keys in the bowl on the table by the door and kick off my shoes. I’m tired, and don’t have the patience to argue with him about whether or not he’s coming to Will’s with me.
Earlier today, I decided I was going to go and collect my things tomorrow rather than today. Every movement is an effort and I can barely keep my eyes open and I don’t know what’s waiting for me when I get there. I’d rather not be half asleep in case I run into him.
I’m the first to break the tension building in the room with each second that passes. “Hello.”
“Hi.” He pauses briefly, before standing and asking, “Are you ready?”
I take a step forward and reply, “You really don’t need to come with me.”
He straightens his red tie with one hand, smoothing down the fabric with the other. My eyes track the movement before I catch myself and look away.
“I know, but I’m going to. I told Sutton I would.”
Right. I huff out a laugh at his statement. Better than anyone, I know that whatever Noah Parker says, he means. Even if it’s that you’re nothing but a sister to him.
“I’d rather you didn’t.”
Noah shoves his hands deep into his pockets as he rocks back and forth on his heels. Nodding, he replies, “That might be so, but I’m going to.”
We stand, silently staring at each other, until I roll my eyes and turn toward my room without a word.
Looks like we’re getting this over and done with today.
In my room, I strip down and throw on a pair of denim shorts and a white t-shirt. Grabbing my phone and a scrunchie from the dresser, I walk back into the open living room. The hairs on my arms stand on end as I feel Noah watching me.
Keeping my eyes down, I tie my hair up into a messy bun, only looking up at him when it’s done. He clears his throat and looks away. I take that as my cue to move to the front door and put on my sneakers.
Snatching up my keys, I wait for Noah by the door expectantly. As he strides across the space, an awareness I shouldn’t be feeling ripples through me and my breath hitches as he gets closer.
I spin on my heel, throwing open the door and all but running to the elevator, jabbing at the button as if he’s an axe murderer, and this is my only escape. It’s hard to not miss the deep chuckle that rumbles in his chest as he comes to stand next to me.
“I’m not going to hurt you, Van. You don’t need to run from me like I’m a murderer.”
How did he do that?
I eye him skeptically from the corner of my eye. He doesn’t know me well enough to be able to read my mind like that. Not any more.
Choosing to keep quiet, I aimlessly scroll through my phone until the elevator arrives. We ride down without a word being spoken.
It’s only as we’re walking across the lobby that Noah speaks again. “The car should be at the curb.”
I hum a reply, intent on making this as painless as possible. Any time I’m in his vicinity, I’m reminded of everything we’ve shared and how heartbroken he left me.
Neither of us attempts to make conversation with the other as we ride to Will’s place. I chat to Rupert, and Noah busies himself with his phone.
When we pull up outside the house, I suck in a breath, preparing myself for whatever might be beyond the door. Climbing out onto the pavement, I take in the almost eerie emptiness of the block. You wouldn’t think you were in New York if the skyscrapers weren’t peeking above the skyline. I walk up to the front door, using my key to let us into the brownstone.
As we step inside, the lingering smell of cigarette smoke and rotting food hits me. My eyes water and my stomach turns.
