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“I’m sorry, angel. You’re like a sister to me. I can’t do that with you.”
I reel at his statement. My arms coming up to cover myself as a heat so different to the one I felt moments ago washes through my body. This one is embarrassment and humiliation mixed together, dragging me down.
Desperate to not feel this way, I mutter, “You don’t mean that.” An urgency takes over as I continue, “I’ve seen the way you look at me, Noah. The hunger in your eyes.”
Sighing, he rubs the back of his neck as he says, “You don’t know shit, Van. I have a girlfriend. And even if I didn’t, I wouldn’t hook up with a kid.”
It’s like my world has imploded. My only saving grace is that he doesn’t stick around to watch me crumble. Noah turns on his heel and leaves me to surrender to the pain coursing through my body.
From this moment on, I vow to never beg him or another man for affection. My guard is up.
Two weeks later, I lose my virginity to Alfie Devereux in the back of his parent’s car. I feel nothing but a sense of loss deep in my heart.
I don’t see Noah again for the rest of summer.
THIRTY-FOUR
Noah
Savannah’s back is to me as she scrubs soap all over her body. The body that’s now burned into my memory forever. My hands slide around her waist and I pull her back into me, dipping to whisper in her ear, “You won’t scare me off, angel. Now I’ve had a taste of you, I’m fucking addicted.”
Savannah stills before she composes herself and steps out of my embrace under the water. I watch, enthralled as it washes away the suds. Her nipples pebble under my scrutiny, and in the confines of the shower, I hear the barely audible hitch in her breath.
“Van, don’t look at me like that.”
Her tongue darts out and swipes over her lips. Her voice is husky when she asks, “Like what?”
I look away, closing my eyes as I try to gain some sort of control over my raging arousal. “Like you’re ready for me again.”
Dainty hands touch my stomach, my muscles tensing and contracting under her fingers. My gaze finds hers, the need clear. An overwhelming urge to know that she won’t think this is a mistake tomorrow rushes through me.
Cupping her cheeks, I bend my knees searching her eyes as I ask, “Do you think what we did was a mistake?” I don’t realize how desperate I sound until my words hang in the air around us.
Her mouth drops open before she closes it and grips onto my wrists with her hands. “How could you even think that?”
I don’t answer. Because how could I? Everything she’s done up until this moment has screamed at me that she’s enjoyed every second of what’s happened since I touched her in that alleyway.
At my continued silence, Savannah’s voice is soft, almost cajoling when she says, “Noah. Why would you think that I thought us having sex was a mistake?”
A heavy breath leaves me. I need to answer her, even if it bares all of my insecurities. “I just needed to know that you feel as overwhelmed as I do by all of this. That you want this as much as I do.”
Shaking her head with a huff of a laugh, Savannah replies, “What part of‘I need to move out so I don’t beg you to do this again’, makes you think I didn’t want any of this?”
Sheepishly, I duck my head because I’m clearly a fucking idiot. My chest swells as her words sink in. She wants to do this. My dream girl wantsme.
With my confidence rebuilt, I wrap an arm around her waist, tugging her into me as I murmur into her hair, “For the record, I won’t ever deny you if you beg me. Scratch that, I might, but only if it’s to make it so much better for you.”
When I release her, her dark blue eyes are swirling with arousal, the ring of gold around her iris more prominent.
Savannah opens the door and steps from the shower. Her gaze on me as she grabs a towel and pats herself dry. When she’s done, she puts it back on the towel bar and walks from the bathroom. Her eyes seek me out over her shoulder on the threshold, promises alight in them.
Fuck.She’s a temptress and I’m not immune to her pull.
I switch off the shower and step out into the now cool air of the bathroom. Using her towel, I dry myself before switching off the bathroom light and following her to her bedroom.
Savannah slips under the covers as I reach the doorway. Although she keeps one side of the sheet pulled back and her invitation is clear, I still need her to tell me what she wants.
She flutters her eyelashes, her gaze dropping to my painfully hard dick. My hand rubs over my chest and down my stomach, wrapping around my cock as I stroke myself. I watch as her eyes follow the movement and it’s an effort to keep the smile off my face.
