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"Anyway," he continues. "They've figured out who leaked the photos and she's been fired, but she got six figures from a tabloid site for the photos and a few other bits of gossip, so I don't think she's too broken up about losing her job."
"But, what are people saying?"
He chuckles again, but I can tell it's forced. "Oh, everything from an alien abduction to a sex change surgery."
"What about my dad?" I ask, hating the fact that my voice quivers.
"He does not think it's an alien abduction or sex reassignment." He tries to keep his voice light, but I can hear the tension. "He's been all over me trying to find out where you are, but I've stopped taking his calls and I changed my gate code so he can't get in here. Besides, I think he's afraid of me. He should be. I've been wanting to snap his beady little head off his shoulders for years. The way he treats you..." his voice trails off but I know what he's thinking.
My father treats me like shit. It wasn't so bad at the beginning, when I was singing at the county fair or a wedding or two. Even the interview with him before my first appearance onThe Next Big Starwas sweet. He seemed proud and happy.
Then I won and the money started rolling in. I was only fifteen, I had no clue. Looking back, though, I realize how it changed everything.
Do I regret it?
I don't know.
Too late now, anyway.
"I'm sorry that I left you to handle all of this. That was too much to ask. I should have just stood up to him myself instead of sneaking off. I was just so desperate, I wasn't thinking straight."
"I don't recall you asking. You need a break. You've been at this since you were fifteen. You never even got to go to high school like a regular kid. You need time to figure out what's best for you. Don't worry about the rest of us."
"That's easier said than done."
"Isn't everything," he says and he sounds tired.
"I hope you've been resting, thinking about what's best for you," I say.
"What's best for me is for you to be happy."
"I don't deserve a friend like you."
"Of course you do. You deserve a thousand friends like me. What you don't deserve are those money grubbing parents of yours. Now, tell me more about life in the wilderness, Jane Goodall. What're you up to today?"
I pause with my mouth hanging open. One good thing about this flip phone is that we can't Facetime so he can't see the panicked expression on my face.
"I-I thought I'd go on a picnic, actually." There, that's even truthful.
"That's fantastic. I'm glad you're leaving the cabin. But be careful. And be sure to check in with me when you get back. I'd hate for you to be attacked by more wild kittens."
CHAPTER7
ALEX
I hang up with Nicco and worry fills me. I can only imagine the horror my father is being. He's not prone to calm and reason. Sadness filters into the worry. He used to be fun loving and well, just loving in general. Then the fame and money came along and he changed. It was gradual. And I was just a kid. Fifteen when I wonThe Next Big Starcompetition.
I still remember how my legs trembled when I walked out on the stage in front of the judges and that huge audience. There were more people sitting there than even lived in the town where I grew up. But once the music started and I began to sing, the audience reaction was intoxicating.
I think about all of this as I put the finishing touches on my outfit. I look into the mirror and once again apologize to the girl I used to be, though I am feeling more and more like her as time passes. With each day, each deep breath of air, each decision that I make all on my own, whether it's what to have for breakfast or what time to go to bed, I'm returning to myself.
I'm wearing jeans and a T-shirt, as well as sandals and a pair of dangling earrings. Not the giant chandeliers that Xandra wears, but some fun earrings that I bought for myself a few years ago when I managed to sneak out and do some shopping on my own. It lasted about an hour before someone recognized me and a crowd gathered.
Now I do all my shopping online. It's convenient, but isolating.
I know that sounds ironic since I am always surrounded by staff and when I go out, the fans seem to come from all directions, but it feels like everyone wants a piece of me and it's draining. So draining.
There's a quick rap on the front door and my tummy flutters. Caleb is here. And he's taking me on a picnic.
