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“When you say ‘patch things up,’ what do you mean, exactly? Explain.”
I hesitated. “I’m still battling with myself. I feel so torn between two versions of who I am.”
“I see. Continue,” Dr. Grey said.
“I’ve known all along about Aria’s visits with Evan. I don’t know why, but it hurts. It hurts knowing she’s dismissed my warnings and is pushing me away. The silent treatments had got to me. To be honest, the first night Vanessa and I rekindled our sex life, I was drunk. Aria had gone out, as usual—I rarely sawher home since we’d been feuding. Vanessa was with me that evening, and I was sexually frustrated. One thing led to another, and… Since then, the sex has been regular.”
“How do you feel about that, Noah?”
My mind wanted to respond with:Good! Everything is as it should be.But my heart detected the lie and felt the exact opposite.
“I feel empty.”
“Do you love your wife?”
“Yes.”
“Are you stillin lovewith your wife?”
I could hear his words, but they didn’t seem to register. “If I wasn’t in love with her, I wouldn’t have married her.”
“That doesn’t answer my question. Are you still in love with Vanessa?”
“Yes!” I grew frustrated.
“That sounds more forced than honest.”
“Are you trying to tell meyouknow how I feel about my wife?”
“No, I’m simply trying to help you be honest with yourself.”
I groaned in annoyance and rubbed my temples. “I have romantic feelings for Aria, okay? I know I shouldn’t, and I know I can’t just turn them off. But they’re real, and strong.”
I hated it. Being this vulnerable made me feel so powerless.
“I know I probably broke several laws these past three weeks, but…”
“But what?”
“I don’t know, Doc.” I gravely looked at him.
“Do you regret going that far with your daughter?”
“I wish you’d stop saying that.”
“Saying what?”
My voice was razor sharp. “The part where you refer to her as my daughter.” Aware of the change in my disposition, I stood up and paced the floor.
“But that’s who Aria is, your daughter.”
“She doesn’t feel like my daughter!” I erupted.
“Of course, she doesn’t.”
“Are you gonna have me arrested now? Because I don’t care anymore—and I won’t put up a fight.”
“Noah, it’s clear you genuinely love her. Your situation is convoluted. I understand you better than you think. Putting you behind bars is not only a waste of taxpayers’ dollars, but it’s not the right thing to do in this situation. Aria is an adult, so it’s not like you started anything with a minor. Although, you bent the law. To commit incest, one must follow through with the act through a consummated union.”
