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All of a sudden, Auggie picks up a stick next to him on the bed and pokes it through the curtain, alongside his foil-covered cock. It’s a redhaired, paper princess that’s attached to the end of the stick. Which means . . .Auggie’s foil-covered cock must be a knight in shining armor!Yep, it’s definitely a puppet show. A highly X-rated one.
From where the laptop is resting on the bed, I’m deducing the red curtains obscure Auggie’s upper torso from his audience’s view. But from whereI’mstanding on this stepstool, I can seeeverything. The puppet show itself. Auggie’s head and some backstage maneuverings. Also, a few other sticks on the mattress, in addition to the paper princess he’s now using, all of them lying in wait for their turn in the show.
All of a sudden, the princess and the knight are joined by a red paper dragon on a stick. Oh no! The dragon is breathing fire—paper flames on a stick! And now, the dragon is dragging the princess away. Whatever will the tin-foil-covered cock-prince do?
Enter a white stallion, which Auggie’s cock hops on and rides across the length of the stage to hilarious effect. In fact, I’m laughing so hard, I quickly turn away from the wall for a moment to make sure Auggie can’t hear me.
Surely, Auggie’s making bank doing this show, because it’sfantastic. Five big-cock stars, if you ask me. Auggie is gorgeous to look at naked, first of all. Sexy as hell. But on top of that, his show somehow manages to be silly, zany, and fun, in addition to being a sexy smoke show.
The princess is surrounded by flames now.
But never fear, Auggie’s massive cock bounds onto the scene to save the day. In short order, the tin-foil-covered knight jumps off his trusty steed and quickly sheds his armor with the help of a rather large hand that breaks the fourth wall and rips the foil away. As the princess remains surrounded by paper flames, that same big hand begins stroking the knight’s hard length, up and down, repeatedly, until, finally . . .success. White ejaculate spurts out the knight’s thick head, causing the paper flames to disappear behind the curtain. Oh my god, that was pure insanity. And so much sexy fun, I can barely keep my balance on this stepstool.
There’s a pause in the action. A moment when nothing is happening onstage. From what I can see of Auggie behind the curtain, it looks to me he’s collecting himself. But soon, we’re back. The paper princess springs to life and presses herself against Auggie’s wilting cock, presumably thanking him for “coming” to her rescue. Ha. Pun intended, I’m sure. A moment later, the wilting cock and the paper princess both disappear behind the curtain, replaced by a little sign I can’t read from here. Shoot.
Auggie removes the curtain contraption and sits upright. He shoves his mask-covered face into his laptop screen, gesticulating and bobbing his head. Presumably, he’s talking enthusiastically.Oh, how I wish I could hear what he’s saying.
His gesticulating done, Auggie blows kisses at the screen and waves goodbye, and a moment later, he closes his laptop and rips off his mask, confirming, as suspected, the handsome,sweaty, naked man behind the mask, the dude with the shockingly impressive cock, is indeed Augustus Vaughn.
Auggie’s hair is askew, thanks to the mask. His face is flushed. He runs a palm down his face, looking a bit forlorn. And then, with a visible sigh, he slides off his bed and saunters out of view—but not before giving me a mouthwatering view of his naked ass.Damn, boy.
I’m probably going to hell for watching that long. It was an unthinkable, inexcusable violation of Auggie’s privacy to do that, most likely. And yet, as horrible as it was for me to keep watching till the bitter end of the show, I can’t honestly feel sorry I did it because that was the most entertaining, hottest, funniest thing I’ve seen in a long time. Maybe, ever. I didn’t even know it was possible to simultaneously laugh andlustlike that, all at once. But now I know.Bravo, Auggie Vaughn. My gorgeous next-door neighbor. A wholesome-looking vet student in his real life . . . and now I know: a secret, kinky penis puppeteer behind closed doors.
I pull away from the peephole, my mind racing, and pace around the room. With a dick and a shtick like that, Auggie’s got to be killing it in the online penis puppetry game! Is that a thing out there? If so, I had no idea.
The real question is what “killing it” looks like in the penis puppetry game, in terms of money earned? I know very little about online sex workers and porn stars; but I’ve heard it’s possible to make six figures and more doing kinky stuff online. Is that puppet show the reason Auggie’s able to live in a condo near campus, all by himself, even though he’s a student? I bet it is.
As I pace around my bedroom and gather my thoughts about this unexpected new information, I’m in danger of wearing an O-shaped loop in the already worn carpet.What. Should. I. Do?
I definitely have to tell Auggie about the peephole. That’s the right thing to do. Surely, the former owner used it to spy on himdoing his racy shows, and also, possibly, doing who-knows-what else in private, with whatever parade of women Auggie’s had in his bed. Auggie’s notmytype, granted, but he’s theworld’stype. There’s a reason boy bands are huge. I’m sure Auggie’s had quite a few eager guests in his bed for Lloyd Graham to covertly watch. The thought makes my blood curdle and my stomach churn. Nobody deserves to have their privacy invaded like that.Nobody. Not even someone as annoying as Auggie Vaughn.
Out of nowhere, the devil on my shoulder pokes at me. “Okay, hear me out,” she says. “What if you tell Auggie you watched his puppet show . . . and then use that information to get the money you need for Carlo?”
“What?” I mentally shout, thoroughly disgusted.That’d be blackmail, She-Devil.A truly despicable thing to do. Not to mention, a crime.
“Yeah, but you’ve already committed a crime against Mr. DiMarco, haven’t you?” my inner She-Devil retorts. “So it wouldn’t even be your first crime.”
It’s not the same thing, and you know it. Committing a crime against a criminal isn’t nearly as awful as committing one against an innocent person like Auggie. Also, I’m not a career criminal, for fuck’s sake. True, I made a singular mistake, once, but I don’t plan to continue the trend. If I used this ill-gotten information against Auggie in any way, even if I promised to pay him back with interest later on, I’m sure I’d inflict untold distress and harm upon the poor guy and he doesn’t deserve that, even if I’m right—and I know I am!—and Auggie’s the bastard who called that damned tow truck on me.
I plop down onto my air mattress, mulling the situation. Maybe Auggie would be willing to teach me the ropes, so I can make some fast, easy money, like he does? Or even better, maybe he’d let me joinhisshow for a while—just until I’ve resolved my present emergency? The idea makes my heart ratespike, even though I don’t have the first clue how I’d finagle that outcome. I bet if I were to join Auggie’s show, we could double whatever he’s currently making, maybe even triple it, by making my naked, female, body parts part of the plot and/or scenery. I’d attract a whole new audience to his shows, I bet, and a wider audience would translate into evenmoremoney for both of us to split, right?
Yes. I’m suddenly seeing it all so clearly. The only question is how I should broach the topic with Auggie, since I can’t tell him about the nature of my current financial crisis. I’d need to tell him about the peephole. That part is settled. But what should I tell him I witnessed when I looked through it?
I can’t admit I watched Auggie’s entire puppet show without revealing I was a very bad girl. A Peeping Charlotte. At least, I can’t tell him that, right away, before he’s learned to like and trust me. Once he knows I’m not nearly as bad a person as he’s been led to believe—by me and my horrible actions, to be clear—perhaps he’ll then be in the right headspace to hear me out about a joint puppet show. By then, I’m sure I’ll have figured out some story to tell him aboutwhyI need money fast. In fact, I could simply tell him I got laid off and leave it at that.
Okay.
That’s my plan.
When I knock on Auggie’s door, I won’t immediately tell him what I saw through the peephole. I’ll tell him I peeked through it when I first discovered it, and he wasn’t at home at the time. In fact, I’ll knock on Auggie’s door tomorrow afternoon—immediately after he comes back home from class, since that’ll be a much more believable time to say I found the hole while he was gone.
From there, I’ll let Auggie get over the shock for a bit, while also letting him get to know me better—the real me, not the horrible version I’ve been with him; and when I’m sure Auggieno longer thinks I’m the second coming of Satan, I’ll tell him the truth about what I actually saw through the peephole, while taking great care to assure him I’d never, ever,everuse that private, confidential information to harm him in any way.
“Your secret’s safe with me,” I’ll tell him. And Auggie will believe me by then because he’ll know me better than he does now. He’ll actually like me by then. And once that initial phase of my plan is a success, only then will I move on to phase two: springing my joint puppet show idea on him and convincing him it’d make fabulous business sense for us to join forces and make tons of money, together. Yup. That’s my plan.And it’s freaking brilliant.
9
AUGGIE
