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Pulling her mobile away from her ear, she double-checked her missed call list. ‘Yes, you did. About half an hour ago.’
‘Well, if I did, I certainly didn’t mean to. Are you sure it was me and not another Mick?’
She shook her head. Why was he being so awkward? He’d been the one to reach out to her, not the other way around. ‘I don’t know any other Micks. Besides, I clicked on the number showing up in my missed call list.’
Silence.
‘Are you still there?’ She frowned. She shouldn’t have called him back. She should have just ignored the missed call.
‘Look, Holly. I dont know what you want from me but I have nothing to give you. I tried my best to support you after your parents passed away and all you did was to push me away.’ His voice was calm, authoritative.
Holly opened and closed her mouth. She didn’t want anything from him. He’d been the one to ring her. ‘I don’t want anything from you, Mick. I was just returning your call. Forget about it.’ Pulling her phone away from her ear, she paused, her thumb on the End Call button as he spoke again.
‘You need to move on. Yes, we had a great time. We were good together but nothing lasts forever. You know that more than most of us.’ the last phrase was clipped. Unkind.
Had he really said that? Had he meant it the way it had sounded? When had things become so strained between them? She stared out across the ocean. The waves were calm as they inched across the sand towards her. What was she doing still listening to him? She was on the phone. She was in charge of the situation. Taking a deep breath, she spoke again, trying her best to keep the upset from her vice, trying her most to keep her voice steady, calm. ‘I don’t have t listen to this. Please delete me from your contacts so you don’t accidentally ring me again.’
Throwing her mobile on the sand, she sank down next to it. Why did she let him get to her? They were only words. And he was hundreds, if not thousands of miles away. She shouldn’t have rung him back. She shouldn’t have even thought for a millisecond that he might have been ringing to see if she was okay.
She dug her fingers into the sand as she stared out across the ocean; the tears falling hot against her cheeks. He’d begun distancing himself from her shortly after the accident. When she’d needed him the most, he’d pulled himself away, created an emotional barrier between them, all the time blaming her. Blaming her grief for the breakup of their relationship.
A light flickered on the horizon. A boat. From here it looked as though it were going impossibly slowing, moving a millimetre a minute across the waters, less than that even.
Had he been right, though? Did nothing last forever? They hadn’t. She and Mick’s relationship had ended, and she’d once thought he might be the one for her. Pulling her hands from the sand, she watched as the tiny grains filtered through her fingers, finding their way home. Look how that relationship had turned out. Maybe he had a point.
Her phone vibrated across the sand. She hadn’t turned the ringtone on yet, not since stepping outside the bakery. Leaning forward, she gingerly picked it up. Please don’t be Mick again.
Relief flooded through her body as she realised it was Joe’s name lighting up the screen. Joe. Her Joe. She frowned, Mick’s words echoing in her mind, ‘nothing lasts forever.’
What if she and Joe were to split up? Or should that be when they break up? Mick used to love her, be kind to her, care for her, tell her he wanted to be with her always, and look at how quickly that had changed.
If she and Joe split up, she wouldn’t just be losing a boyfriend, a partner, she’d be losing her friend too, her best friend. They could tell each other that they’d revert to being friends again as much as they liked, but they wouldn’t, not when it came to it. Nobody did. It was a false promise.empty words.
Things felt different with Joe, though. He felt like home.
She swiped at her tears. Was that simply because they’d known each other for years, that they had been able to bypass that awkward, first getting to know you part of a new relationship? Or was it because they knew each other so well that she felt this way? Was it because she knew him through and through and accepted and loved each little habit and quirk of his?
She didn’t know what to think. But she knew she didn’t want to lose him. She didn’t want to lose his friendship. Had they made the wrong decision? Should they have just stayed friends?
Standing up, she pulled the sleeve of her coat across her face. She didn’t know what to think anymore.
––––––––
‘HAPPY CHRISTMAS EVE!’ Diane clapped her hands before throwing her arms around Elsie and hugging her tight. ‘I can’t wait for tomorrow.’
‘We can tell.’ Elsie chuckled as she hugged her back.
‘What time isChristmasdinner?’Dianestepped back.
‘Oneo’clock.’ Elsie grinned.
‘Great.’ Diane licked her lips. ‘I canalmosttaste theturkey already.’
‘Go on, be off with you. Enjoy youeveningwith your parents.’ Elsie grinnedandpulledopenthe door, holding it open.
‘Yes, I’d better getgoing. Oh, canIgrab a few rolls? Iforgottogetthem earlier.’ Diane slapped herforehead.
‘Of course you can, love.’ Elsie began bagging up the rolls that were left over int he basketson thecounter.
