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Raven squeezed my knee, pulling me back to the moment. “You don’t have to go on.”
“I need to for both of us. She never asked much from me. She was a middle school teacher. I never brought work home. While I had her shadowed by a bodyguard, I did my best never to allow her to know that. All she asked was that we have a date night once a month. That was it. She knew I worked long hours and that was fine with her. I made and kept the promise. I usually did so without having a soldier with me. It was always fine.”
“Until it wasn’t.”
“No,” I answered, taking Raven’s hand and kissing her palm before leaning back against the stairs. “Business had taken a rough turn, an unexpected enemy creating problems, including setting a fire to one of our warehouses, which almost prevented me from being able to make our date. I was lucky, my brother stepping in because he knew how important it was. Anyway. It was a Wednesday. My sister was keeping Zoe, and we went to a dinner and a movie. She was a little feisty that night and when we went to the car, we spent some time kissing.” I laughed at the thought.
Raven swam closer, finally easing beside me on the stairs, still quiet.
“The shot came from nowhere. A single bullet catching her between the eyes. I didn’t have time to tell her goodbye or that I loved her. She was gone in a split second.”
“Oh, my God,” she choked. “I’m so sorry.”
“I was torn, wanting desperately to chase after the assassin and but needing to stay with her. The asshole got away.”
“Did the authorities ever find him?”
“My father wouldn’t allow the police to be called. He was the Don of the family at the time. What he said was what happened. He sent men to find out who was responsible.”
“But the person wasn’t found.”
“No, even though everyone in the family had our suspicions, it could never be proven. I held it against my father for years, but he did try. His reactions were based on the old ways, methods my grandfather had taught him. When I took over the helm, I vowed that things would be different. They have been but I became a shell of a man, trying to be the best single father I could be. I don’t know any longer. I wanted revenge for so long that it was almost all I could think about. But there was Zoe who wanted me to read to her, take her shopping and to amusement parks. Zoe was always there, her big eyes exactly like her mother’s. And she told me every night she loved me. Eventually, I put the need for revenge in a dark place, concentrating on raising my beautiful daughter. Without her in my life, I don’t know what would have happened. But I won’t let you be hurt because of greed or the need for retaliation.”
“I have a feeling you raised a beautiful, perfectly normal daughter who adores you. While I understand the need to shut yourself off, refusing to feel that kind of pain again, you refused to allow your enemy to take everything from you. That took courage and love. That shows me what kind of a man you are. Maybe I was wrong about you after all.”
I rose to my feet, immediately scooping her into my arms. As I cradled her against my chest, she nuzzled her head in my neck. “No, princess. You weren’t wrong about me. I’m exactly like you described. A monster.”
CHAPTER20
Raven
Danger lurked in the shadows, waiting with sharp teeth, famished for the taste of flesh and blood. As I stood staring out the window, I could almost see the boogeyman in the darkness.
Or maybe I was sleeping next to one.
We both knew an unknown enemy was waiting for the perfect opportunity. While Arman had told me only a little of what had been going on with his business, I sensed he was in distress, even checking on his daughter twice since he’d carried me inside and up to his room.
Even though I’d sensed a weight being pulled off him with his admittance of what had occurred with Sophia, he was still hiding something that was eating him alive. I could feel it thick and heavy in the air and when he held me.
When he looked into my eyes, his were pools of sadness, haunted. If only he would trust me. If only I could implicitly trust him. There was so much bad blood, so much anger that I continued to wonder what the underlying source could be. I was very observant, excellent at reading people, and whatever he was continuing to hide from me would alter my life even more than marrying my father’s enemy. I was certain of it.
The yin and yang of my feelings kept butterflies in my stomach. Love and hate. I continued to dwell on that fine line enough that my mind couldn’t rest. We were toxic together, combustible but the passion lingered long after the act was over. Was that normal? Was there any such thing in his world? I thought about what he’d said. My life had been anything but atypical. Who was I to judge what families were supposed to be like? My father wasn’t a warm man, always pushing his two children to excel in everything, determined I would be an officer of the law.
Mother was a beautiful fake. There was love for her kids and in her relationship with my father, but it was as if both had been looking from the outside in their entire lives. As if they were taking an easy road out. Maybe I was wrong. God knew I wasn’t the best judge of character at this point. I bit back a laugh, giddy with happiness on one side and delirious with anxiety on the other. I was a complete mess. At least the night had been unexpectedly amazing.
He’d brought wine and cheese, French bread and pâté. And we’d enjoyed a picnic on the bed while talking about hopes and dreams. Correction, my hopes and dreams.
Arman and I had made love again, the man taking me in front of the window then keeping our fingers entwined as he pressed his full weight on top of me. It had felt glorious, as if the truth and his enemy could be kept at bay.
Only I wasn’t a princess, he wasn’t a true prince, and this certainly wasn’t a castle made of gold. However, it didn’t change the way I felt about him. In sharing with me what had happened with Sophia, I should be even more terrified, but strangely enough, I wasn’t. Maybe it was because I’d always had the belief that when it was your time to go, there was no chance of stopping it. That allowed me to enjoy my life without fear of facing some unknown criminal like my father had worked so hard to lock up.
Or maybe it was because I knew Arman would do everything in his power to protect me.
My father had tried so hard to keep me close, terrified that I’d become a victim of his world, just like what Arman was experiencing. Yet, here I was, the fiancée of the very kind of man my father had warned me about. What struck me as the oddest aspect of all was that with Arman, I was beginning to feel as if this had been my place all along, not sheltered in the way my father had done.
I also couldn’t help but to erase the notion that Arman knew him more than he was willing to let on. What did it matter, other than my husband-to-be’s intent on marrying me was fueled by the very revenge that had plagued him since his wife’s murder. I pressed my hand against the glass, hearing him stir behind me. He’d fallen asleep and I’d watched him for almost thirty minutes, the few peaceful moments rare. I knew that by instinct.
If I had to guess, I’d say the man rarely slept and did so with one eye open.
