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“I heard you’ve written poetry,” I say tentatively. I don’t know how much of her life she wants to share. So far, she has wanted to share nothing. I don’t know why that makes me so incredibly sad.
“I have,” she waves a hand dismissively. “But I wouldn’t judge any talent I may or may not have from them. As for the awards it got, they don’t count. They were… pity awards.”
Ok, I might be a little out of my depth here.
I’ve not read her poetry or looked into her awards. Anything with her name on it I just avoided like the plague. I just couldn’t bring myself to face it.
But now.
Oh, now I’m going to read the hell out of those babies.
“I’m sure you’re being too humble,” I tell her, not sure what she means by ‘pity awards’.
“I’m sure I’m not.”
For the first time, there’s an edge to her voice. It’s dark and bitter and hard. It reminds me of me.
“Let’s start by writing a verse at least.” I climb to my feet and lean down, reaching a hand to her. She looks at it as if it’s made of burning embers. Then she reluctantly takes it, touching just the tips of her fingers to mine.
It hits me like a wave. Just like the first time I met her, when I knew nothing about her, not even her name: that intense need to be around her. Just to breathe the same air she does, even if we barely talk to each other.
I can’t lose this, not right now.We’ll write one song and then she can go, I promise myself.
“Do you have the music?” she asks.
“I always have the music,” I reply.
She stops short, Pooh snoring softly in her arms. She looks so happy and safe with his face smushed on her chest that even though he must be kind of heavy, I don’t dare take him from her. Her eyes are distant, her expression closed.
What did I do?I think in a panic.Do I need to apologize for yesterday? More than I already did?Cause I’ll do it.
“You don’t need to patronize me,” she says. “Everyone knows that you’re as talented as the day is long, but for some reason, someone thought that you needed an English lit student to help you write. But if you don’t need that, then there is nothing more for me to do in Greece. You need to tell me if I have to go, it’s no…”
“Hey hey, stop!” She’s about to say that she will leave, and I am prepared to do anything,anything, in order to stop that from happening. “I’m sorry.” She’s still turning away. “I didn’t mean to patronize you, I didn’t… Look at me, Eden, please.”
She does not.
“I need you,” I say quietly. “If I wrote anything last night, it’s because of you.”
“You said that before.”
“It’s true. The words just come when you’re around.” I look down, trying to find her eyes. The only sounds around us is the water frothing against the boat’s bow and the sails flapping in the wind. Endless blue sky frames her red hair. “That’s the way it’s been from day one. I didn’t know why then and I don’t know why now. But it’s just the way it is. Spencer… He didn’t know when he hired you. He didn’t know about you and me, did he?”
She shakes her head. I don’t know if it was a coincidence or a miracle that brought her here. Or a curse. Either way, I’m too far gone to care.
“Will you please stay and do your job?” I beg her.
Now she looks at me. And I am not ready for that open, vulnerable look in her eyes. I’m standing here, shaking in front of her. She is literally holding my life in her hands. Not to mention my sanity.
“Will you let me?” she asks and I’m so relieved my legs go weak.
I brace myself the railing, nearly going over. She holds on to my elbow to steady me.
“Not sure about that part,” I murmur, trying to clear my vision. I’m suddenly light-headed. “You might have to force me to comply.”
“Don’t faint on me now,” Eden says. She’s still holding on to me. I’m not sure I will keep standing if she lets go. “Let’s get you to your cabin, ok, your highness?”
“Don’t call me that,” I start to say, but then I stop talking. I have to grit my teeth and concentrate on fighting the darkness until I can get to my bed and collapse there, hopefully out of her sight.
